The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
The C2C reading tor today speaks about the importance of the 5th Step . It notes that this is an extremely important, personal step That requires that we share our private thoughts and experiences with another person.. The reading suggests that this step offers personal freedom to the person who is doing the talking and being extremely rewarding to the listener's will
Being available to simply listen to another is a wonderful opportunity to practice unconditional love and support. The reading also points out that when we practice this step by listening or speaking we open ourselves up as channels for HP and often hear something that sheds light on our situation.
The quote is from:"In all our Affairs; "there is no better way of spiritual benefits then by giving them away with love, and with no strings attached.
The5th step is indeed challenging. however, I found the rewards extremely beneficial and urge you all to participate in practicing the steps
I'm back from a lovely vacation and missed you will
Missed you as well! Thank you for the C2C reading today.
I am currently trying to work through this step. I am unable to log onto the Step Board b/c I forgot my password. When I click the "forgot password" option, I do not get a reset sent to my email.
If you have the capability, could you PM me with my password, or at least how to make a new one? I have been eager to work Step 5.
Thank you!
Enjoy this Saturday everyone!
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"The wolf that thrives, is the one you feed." - Cherokee legend
"Hello, sun in my face. Hello you who made the morning and spread it over the fields... Watch, now, how I start the day in happiness, in kindness." Mary Oliver
Aloha Betty and welcome back home. I read that page this morning and shared thoughts with my wife as we get ready to go to our own home groups. Yes the feeling I got with gratitude is that attending the meetings are like doing my 5th step and she agreed. I will focus on the listening section of the 5th where with gratitude I learn from others in recovery and where my peace of mind and serenity have come from.
Coming here and reading and sharing my own ESH is also doing a 5th for me with the outcome always being that I am much better off for having done so.
Mahalo to you and the rest of the family for growing my recovery with me. ((((hugs))))
Thanks for your service, Betty, glad to hear your vacation was nice. Thanks for the ESH shared above.
Doing the 5th step with my sponsor did bring more freedom to me. Telling about all the things I've been ashamed about for so long, afraid of for so long etc. Especially the shameful things, my selfishness, sharing those seemed to have been the most therapeutic for me, not the least because my sponsor accepted me and my past and still acted loving towards me, which was quite a difference from how I've been looking at myself for 10+ years for the most part, which was thinking low of myself mostly, or else thinking I'm better and/or smarter than everyone else while at the same time hating myself for thinking like that.
I hope you have a great day, thanks for being here :)
I learned to make friends inside of Alanon- and this spread outwards... Step 5 morphs for me into steps 8, 9 and 10. It becomes a regalar habit- to share and confide in people. To replace fears with tears, and tears with laughter.... ...
Thank you Betty for your service and the daily. Thanks to all for the shares and ESH....I believe we learn how to listen actively through working with a sponsor, attending meetings and working the steps. I also believe we learn about real honesty - not just cash register style - in the same manner.
The 5th Step on paper appears frightening. Yet, once the 4th is done, and if we have been attending meetings regularly, we understand that there is freedom in shedding the actions/outcomes of the past and we make room for HP to fill us up and speak to us through others. I am grateful that I had a sponsor who really helped me dig deep and was gentle and patient and full of compassion.
I have a tribe beyond my sponsor who know me, my story and we keep no secrets. We meet each week and are in constant contact through the week. We had a great meeting this morning about selfishness and how easy it is to see the faults in others and how we need help at times seeing our own. Each time we are pointing a finger outwards, there are a few more pointed back at self. The steps give us an opportunity to get to know who we truly are, and what our actual needs are. Grateful for Step 5 and the program and MIP family!
A fun-filled full day - we have outstanding weather for our first day of fall. Hope everyone is having a good weekend!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
Excellent perspective Betty, and thank you so very much for posting this.
For me, my perspective, and my experience has always been -- there is a critical need for another person. Period. I've always been surprised, and perplexed, when people say they've done or they are doing the steps alone, they're doing a 4th step alone, or they've written out the 5th step and are doing it by themselves, etc.
I too agree -- doing the steps, going through them, with someone else, who has experience, good program, etc. -- there is nothing that compares to doing the steps.
Thanks again and welcome home Better. It was a beautiful day yesterday and today in NYC.
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Bo
Keep coming back...
God, grant me the serenity...to accept the PEOPLE I cannot change...the courage to change the ONE I can...and the wisdom to know it's ME...
Hey (((Betty))) missed you and glad to see you back...Hope the camping trip was the best!!!
yea, step 5...I have a BMF across the street who is familiar with the steps....al-anon..he doesn't go to meets, like me there is none around so we share a lot....AND we do step 5 together...and boy it is refreshing to be able to share with him and my BFF also my cousin who is working program.....I have THREE very safe people I can share with...
I still say, for me, I have yet to share 100% of me....Close to that??? oh yea...sure have......However, I do hold a teeny bit in reserve...private thoughts, private stuff, However, that said, when I go to chat meets in cyberspace I can open up a bit more because its all anonymous..no faces...no names..nicknames used....its been a while since I've gone, but I don't really in my heart of hearts think that I have to tell ALL...as long as I know it myself...take responsibility for that thought/deed myself and share with my higher power as i understand it...journal it, etc., there are a very few things that I will not reveal to anyone but myself in my meditations and with my HP......
I guess there is that "reserve" in me, that need to protect me with a very few things kept close to my vest, I don't feel it hinders me because I "own it" with me and HP and I journal it...I am not in denial about me, I work my steps 4,10 regularly...and i check my motives.........
I've made amends to ALL of the ones I have done wrong....the ones who were unsafe to "get with", or who passed on, I just addressed what I did with my sponsor or other recovery mate, took responsibility (my bestie male friend and I spoke of taking responsibility with each other today) and I made the efforts to change and so as to not repeat.....there are a very few things that I choose to keep to me AS LONG AS I am aware....accept.....do right action, which I believe that I have, I think, for me, not being in denial..seeing what really is, being aware and coming to the place of acceptance and right action is more important...I don't lie to myself or my higher power within...I bare it ALL to us two....the stuff I HAD to get out to move me forward in recovery, I shared with my three closest confidants, who happen to be program oriented....
Much as I endorse step 5, the telling someone my issues and wrong doings......I don't think I have to go into gory details about my abuse or confess every intrusive thought my trauma has caused me to have, as long as i am aware...accept......take right action for me as none of this has anything to do with making amends to anyone but myself.......
sorry for the rambling post....but reading about step 5, here, brought up some thoughts and feelings.....
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