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Post Info TOPIC: Courage to Change 9/6/18


~*Service Worker*~

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Courage to Change 9/6/18


Good morning MIP.  Today's reading in Courage to Change is about "How Important is It?"  The writer realized that the main focus of mental activities is usually whatever problem, grievance, or irritation that's present at the moment.  Most of 'this' will not matter if we ponder the past in the future - Al-Anon can help address the larger concerns in our lives instead.

Suggested more important things - How can we make better contact with our Higher Power?  Are we taking time to enjoy the present moment?  Are we becoming the person we want to be?  What can we gives thanks for today?

Today's reminder:  Are my priorities in order?  Am I so busy with smaller, less meaningful concerns that I run out of time for the really important considerations?  Today I will make room to think about what really matters.

Today's Quote from Alateen --  A Day at a Time -- "Today I'll use the slogan, "How important is it?"  It will help me think things through before I act and it will give me a better picture of just what is important in my life."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

This slogan and so many others really help me change up my thinking and attitudes.  Before recovery, I would dwell and/or obsess on so many things that were not only 'small potatoes' - they were well beyond my control.  I am grateful that I Al-Anon taught me to take a pause and decide if this 'action/response/effort' is truly aligned with who I am becoming and how I want to be.  

I got choices I didn't realize I had in recovery.  I can chose to respond when I feel moved to do so, and I can chose to not when I add no value.  I don't have to show up for every event I am invited to, fight, drama, chaos, etc.  I don't have to absorb other people's pain, chaos or more today, I can step back and pray for them instead.  I no longer allow negative people and things to dominate my mind space - I let it go and just do me.

Make today a great one - off to golf in a while and we'll likely be dodging rain drops.  We've had a bunch of rain so it's going to be cart path only.  Stay safe and present - you are worth it!



__________________

Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging.  Pause before assuming.  Pause before accusing.  Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret.  ~~~~  Lori Deschene

 

 



~*Service Worker*~

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Good morning IAH Never gave any thought to setting my (Thought) priorities prior to program. Today with the Steps, slogans and principles firmly under my belt I include my entire waking activities in my priority list--- thoughts, words and actions are all included.
Choosing healthy respones to negative situations has become my "Go to" actions and i am ever so grateful to alanon for this major change.
Thanks for your service and Enjoy your day

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Betty

THE HIGHEST FORM OF WISDOM IS KINDNESS

Talmud


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Thank you IAH for your service and Betty for ESH. I like this slogan very much because it helps me "re-set" myself. I had trouble sleeping last night because I am worried about my 13 yr old dog having a bit of trouble walking especially the stairs. When I got up this morning and started worrying, I was able to re-set. I am taking the best care of her I know how to do, which I have control of (what I do), and if things don't improve in a couple days, she will go to the vet. I don't have to worry and obsess about this all day. How important is it? Well actually, it is very important. But using all my tools I know that focused on this situation all day will keep me in a bad place. I don't have to do that to myself. Amen. Lyne

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Lyne



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I have been so remiss on this slogan, I need to staple it to my head....."HOW important is it REALLY????" I've been seemingly fighting everything instead of just stopping....breathing....slowing down......and assessing from a calmer state, just "HOW important is this" Last night, I am doing the tax returns (got 2 more years to goO) for a dear friend and everything that could mess up with the software did..had to do some forms manually, it was so bad...Now THAT was important, getting the return right....but still...I could have backed off....PDF filled in by hand the forms that kept messing up and letting it go.......I find my self fighting when I am under "seige" and not stopping to find another route..another way of doing something...."fighting and protecting" is what I am doing of late....I reeeeely need to re-boot my last few days and just START OVER, beginning with "easy does it" and yes!!!! "HOW important is it????" in the grand scheme of things, yea, his taxes must be right, but I could have backed off sooner, downloaded a PDF form and did the thing manually where it was messing up........I make a "big deal" out of too many small, irritating stuff that I can "go around" improvise on...just do it another way....work other options...........I needed to see this...I havn't been in a good place...have to SLOW down....even my typing..I am reversing letters, stress is bad...........HOW important is his taxes??? VERY important....HOW important is a lot of stupid energies that come at me???? NOT very!!!!! I began this project, stressed out from other "NOT important stuff" so I paid the price...resisting and fighting brings me more stuff to resist and fight.....

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Rose, a work in progress!!!

KEEP IT SIMPLE_EASY DOES IT_KEEP THE FOCUS ON ME



~*Service Worker*~

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Thank you Iamhere for your service. As I frequently post, these dailies keep me grounded...they have become a touchstone of sorts for me!

This one is oh, so good, b/c in my years prior to Al-Anon, I would love to make mountains out of molehills. Looking back, I don't know why I would do this, as I had so much on my plate already!!
For today, I am able to take a step back... to ask myself, "How important is this?" Many times, not really important to carry the worry of the world on my shoulders. Other times very important, and that Pause was enough for me to reboot my behaviors and proceed in the best way.

I love the Ala-Teen quote. I wish I could share it with my son, but his attitude towards Ala-Teen is not that good right now.

Enjoy your golf, Iamhere!

__________________

"The wolf that thrives, is the one you feed." - Cherokee legend

"Hello, sun in my face. Hello you who made the morning and spread it over the fields... Watch, now, how I start the day in happiness, in kindness."  Mary Oliver

 

 



~*Service Worker*~

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PnP, just a thought -- Maybe you can share the 'How Important Is It' slogan with your son, without crediting Alateen. Or consider, just your behavior for him to observe is probably good enough. Recently my grown son mentioned to me that he had confidence he could do a certain repair on his car, because he remembered seeing me do it --- at least 15 years ago! He remembered it when it was useful to him.

IAH, Thank you for the daily. I have been using "How Important Is It" quite a bit lately.

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~*Service Worker*~

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 smile Thanks Iam, and y'all...

Lately I have been using different words- to say the same thing. Like, instead of saying "How important is it", I might say "priorities".

This came up at a meeting I went to last Monday. We talked about how we remember things. Like making lists- and putting the most important items at the top.

I actually have a small blackboard in a corner of the room. And I use chalk. when I come to thing of it- I have seen this- or paper lists in a lot of homes, and in people's lives.

But the key phrase "How Important is it" still resonates. I am not throwing the baby out- with the bath water! smile 

For me- it has been a part of the map of my life- long before I had the blackboard. I also say "First things first". And the classic "One Day At A Time".

The latter saying I chopped and changed with- in my heyday- to "One moment at a Time", or "One time at a time".

I found that my higher power was most powerful- in the present moment. The now. I was very sick- and considered I suffered from psychosis. Also called "burn out". More common- than most people think.

I was locked up with 'stinking thinking' and could find no way out. It was very, very scary.

I do not know how or where that changed- but it has... I am grateful. Happy even.

We all have The courage to change. Heaps and heaps of courage. Finding an outlet for that is a blessing. smile ...

Thanks.



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Each Alanon member is my teacher.                                                                                                                  

bud


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Thank you for your service Iamhere. It's a daily practice for me to shuffle my priority deck... when I'm overwhelmed, I've started giving things a high- med- or low category as they crop up because if I don't everything becomes emotionally insurmountable.

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~*Service Worker*~

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Hey Bud. Oh yea. Sometimes I make a mental list if I am needing to cut back on stress to recover. What reeeely needs to be done?? What can wait some?? What can I get help on??? What can I just toss in the dumpster??? Thanks for the reminder. Hey!!! How is Mr Horse doing???

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Rose, a work in progress!!!

KEEP IT SIMPLE_EASY DOES IT_KEEP THE FOCUS ON ME

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