The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I wrote this post yesterday, but somehow it did not get posted! LOL!
So it was 1 year ago today, that I grabbed my dog, clothes and my son and moved out of the marital home. I gave my spouse "notice" on August 4 to either get into rehab and work a program, or leave. He refused both. So I had to pack things up and leave. By the grace of God, my parent's rental was still empty - Kid and I had a place to go - we would not be homeless!
This year has been tough... and that is an understatement. But we are making it through!
I started school, graduated that program, took a second job, graduated my Kid (senior in HS), helped him get into local college, and received the final divorce decree papers in the mail (TODAY)!
I am officially divorced. Strangely, for all the success I have had this year, I kind of felt like I was in a daze all day. Like, I knew this was coming, but it took so long that I always put it on the back-burner, so-to-speak. So today the reality is hitting me. I thought I would be sad... or maybe relieved. But I think I am just numb, almost ambivalent about it. Odd.
I am thankful we have a roof over our heads.
I am thankful that I finished school and have a brand new career to pursue!
I am thankful for my program and for MIP!
I am so very thankful for my supportive friends!
I am thankful that my Ex finally went to rehab, is working his program and is sober... so that he can be present in his son's life.
I am thankful that the divorce was "by agreement," and Ex is living up to that. Really willing to help in whatever capacity. Sometimes I catch myself thinking, "You dumb-a$$. why didn't you do this and act this way when I was begging you to? Why did the marriage have to end for you to get to this place? But really, there isn't a "why." It just "IS."
I am thankful that Al-Anon and MIP's members have helped me to accept 'What Is," so that I can live without much (if any) resentments.
Thank you all for imparting your nuggets of wisdom, and for being a part of my journey.
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"The wolf that thrives, is the one you feed." - Cherokee legend
"Hello, sun in my face. Hello you who made the morning and spread it over the fields... Watch, now, how I start the day in happiness, in kindness." Mary Oliver
Thanks for sharing your progress (((posiesandpuppies)))) You've had whirlwind of changes in just one year. You sound proud of all you've accomplished and in a place of greater serenity.
You have a beautiful gratitude list!
So glad you found MIP and grateful for your shares. Your avatar always puts a smile on my face. Keep coming back. TT
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Surround yourself with people and elements that support your destiny, not just your history.
Thank you! So much to be grateful for. I find HP always, always, ALWAYS provides. I just have to be willing to let go and trust. You've done a beautiful job of doing just that! Congratulations!
Posiesandpuppies-What a role model you are for courage, strength , and follow through. OMG, I believe you had a roller coaster year and came through with success. I hope you are proud of yourself when the numbness subsides. Great job at change for living a life better for you and your son. Hugs, Lyne
(((PnP))) - awesome share and congratulations on making through this last year - with grace and dignity. Here's to another year/two/more of growth, serenity and whatever comes next. I hope you re-read your share and 'see' all that you've accomplished!! Yay YOU! I too am grateful you're part of MIP and my recovery!!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
((((((((((((((((PnP)))))))))))))))))))) omg...what a beautiful share.....what class and character you show on a continued basis...I am proud to have you as a recovery partner her in alanon.....thank you for being in my life.................HUGSSSSSSS
Thank you, Tiredtonight! You are right...I am pretty proud of what I've accomplished. A year ago I was devastated, broken, barely clinging... my child is what kept me going. If it wasn't for him, I am not sure where I would've ended up.
Aloha, your post means a lot to me, because I have had a hard time trusting in my HP.
Lyne - thank you for the kind words! I always read your posts and look forward to your messages of hope!
Iamhere - You know, I think I WILL go back and read my old posts... it will be interesting to see my progress! Sometimes it is hard to tell from this side. Grace and dignity... that means so much to me, b/c there was a time that I never would've thought I could do that!
Rose - Thank you, my friend! I too am proud to have you as a recovery partner! I always find something of value in your shares! Keep sharing!!
I am looking forward to this next year... one thing is for sure... I will not give up my program nor this community!
Peace!
__________________
"The wolf that thrives, is the one you feed." - Cherokee legend
"Hello, sun in my face. Hello you who made the morning and spread it over the fields... Watch, now, how I start the day in happiness, in kindness." Mary Oliver
Hey, PnP! A lot has happened this year, but what better way to deal with life than with the help of this program :) Celebrate you, and I join in too, along with the others.
((PNP)) Thank you for sharing your journey with us I do admire your ability to act in your own best interest and to keep on keeping on with wisdom , serenity and courage .
You are Proof it works when you Work it... It didn't go as you had Hoped it would, but Look at all that Progress you have Made for yourself, your son, and Your EX... This Program truly is a Miracle in Progress... I Love that Title More every day, just knowing that if we Put in the work, HP Will see us thru to a Better Beginning...
Thanks so Much for Sharing your Experience Strength & Hope... You truly are a Blessing and I'm Grateful you are Here to Share the Journey with us all and Help us Grow as well as Watch you Go :)
Thank you Aline! You are so right on...this program helps us to remove the crazy stuff we learned to do, and it helps us to navigate forward! Love your Avatar! It always makes me think the squirrel is saying, "You talking to me? You talkin' to ME??? LOL Cracks me up every time I see it!
Betty, as someone I look up to on this board for having gone through the fire and come through a Phoenix, I thank you!
Jozie - Thank you! The best part of this site is the support, you know? We've all BTDT (and wore it till it had holes!) LOL! I know that my Ex's recovery is his to hold, and mine is mine to embrace and grow!
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"The wolf that thrives, is the one you feed." - Cherokee legend
"Hello, sun in my face. Hello you who made the morning and spread it over the fields... Watch, now, how I start the day in happiness, in kindness." Mary Oliver
