The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Todays reading compares the work of step four with gardening, and the necessity of removing old growth, roots and tangles before anything new can grow healthfully.
The writer describes hitting a very stubborn tangled root while trying to clear the earth for gardening. He/she gets very frustrated and has to stop. When the removal resumes, a new way of removing the tangled roots is made apparent- taking small pieces out, a little bit at a time, until eventually a large hole is left in the ground and new earth can be put there.
The writer compares this with the help of Al-anon, that we are shown how to get out of our own tangled and can ask our HP for help in preparing for new growth.
This metaphor resonates with me, and I would add that the patience one needs when gardening can also be applied to our growth in recovery. Sometimes we may hit a tangle we didnt see or growth may take longer than expected.
Today I will focus on new growth, and continuing to weed out whatever may be in the way of that growth. I hope everyone has a great Sunday!
Good Morning Mary What an inspiring topic !!!I know I had/have many negative attitudes tangled up deep within. Working this program (mostly the Steps and examining my motives at every turn) helped me to develop honesty, and courage and these have diminished much of the "Tangle" Love the tools of this program and appreciate your service Enjoy your day.
Good morning Mary and Betty! Thank you both for your ESH and shares. Many thanks also for your service and the daily.
My approach to most things before recovery was 'all/nothing'. I have learned in recovery that my way got me to a certain point and then, like the tangled roots - I would hit road blocks. However, when I instead set aside my ego, my way, my will and use the tools to be open, honest and humble I can see there are other ways to get through the tangles of life.
I am grateful for recovery, the gift of humility and a relationship with a HP that has carried me more than I know. I am off to a meeting in a while and then golfing later with others in recovery. Make it a lovely day all!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
Thanks for your service Mary, and Betty and IAH. Often members write about layers of an onion and the gardening and tangled roots reminded me of that. Either way, it's true, and I find patience is often necessary. And my patience level seems to depend upon having good sleep and not so much stress all at once. Recently I had an hour of making the most frustrating calls, two to insurance companies , and I found myself all bent out of shape over things I could not control. I didn't cope well at that moment but the next day I was calm about all of it. That's why ODAT is so important. I am a grateful member of Alanon, Lyne
Good Sunday morning (where I live) MIP!
Thank you Mary for your service... I find that these posts are essential for me. And a huge appreciation for all those above who share their ESH on the topic!
It's really funny that you posted this particular "Hope" b/c my son was helping me plant some plants that have needed to get into the ground yesterday. One plant in particular was my favorite - a dinner plate hibiscus - and he was having a heck of a time getting the hole dug. There was a water pipe, and tons of roots to contend with. I came over and said, "Let's hold off and plant the others and come back to this." We did and before hitting that hole again, I told him, "Let's pause and look at this from all the angles... maybe we can see an easier way to dig this." I then showed him how to cut through the roots with a shovel. We finally got my favorite plant in the ground & hopefully it will survive! LOL!
So I really identify with the metaphor the writer used!
Peace & Love!
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"The wolf that thrives, is the one you feed." - Cherokee legend
"Hello, sun in my face. Hello you who made the morning and spread it over the fields... Watch, now, how I start the day in happiness, in kindness." Mary Oliver
we had trouble with roofwater drainage round the sid eof our house- had to dig a big hole. There was a rose bush there and had to work around it. Now ah is putting things together- and decided that the bush was starting to block the path. So I pruned it back to growing wood and will start again. OI always seemed to want novelty and change. But also somethings regular and constant. Now that i have grasped the spiritual principles of Alanon I can have both. ...
Thank you Mary. I had so much roots and tangles in my garden, I needed a backhoe to get mine out. I wanted the instant recovery the instant gratification, the instant cure, I had been in pain for so long I wanted it to be gone now.
I did not understand that it took me a long time to get this sick, it is going to take a long time to get well. So I got a smaller pair of serrated edge shears and just decided to take the defects out chunk by chunk, one chunk at a time and just keep at it with persistence and dedication and little by little I notice I am either free of these unwanted traits or I can manage them
The hope for today dailies is one of my favorite readings. Thank you for sharing this
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