The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Tomorrow's reading is about "Letting Go and Letting God". The author talks about learning to identify illusions that make life unmanageable. An example provided is the author wanted to stop controlling people and situations. The more effort applied, the more frustration that came. Another mentioned that we can't give up that which we don't have - so instead, the author opted to work on giving up the illusion of control. "Once I saw that my attempts to exercise power were based on illusions, it was easier to 'Let Go and Let God."
The author also discusses the illusion of a large whole within self. Compulsive shopping, obsessing about relationships, trying to fix everyone else's problems - these are some ways we try to fill this hole. Yet, in recovery, we come to understand the issue is spiritual emptiness and must be filled from within. Healing really happens when we work on our spiritual void vs. seeking outside solutions.
Reminder -- Today, if I hear myself thinking that I am not good enough or that I need something outside myself to make me whole, I'll know that I am listening to illusions. Today I can call an Al-Anon friend and come back to reality.
Quote -- from William James -- ". . . Human beings, by changing the inner attitudes of their minds, can change the outer aspects of their lives."
For me, so long as I held on to my ego and need to be right, the healing was superficial and slow. When I truly embraced that I am powerless over other people, places and things and could work on saving me with the grace of a higher power, real joy, healing and peace entered my life. The only way I know how to grow the healthy aspects of me and my life is to use all the tools available to keep my focus on me, keep trusting the program, the process and my higher power and to stay present. When I find myself restless, irritable or discontent I need to lean into recovery.
When I start giving advice and 'you should, you must, etc...' I know I need to lean into recovery. What recovery tells me to do each day is to focus on self, practice gratitude and doing the next right thing and trust in a power greater than self. Today, I am OK to be happy, and allow others to be right. I hang with healthy people, and pray each morning to be placed where I can be of maximum service for self and others. I am grateful to be who I am and not who I used to pretend to be.
Make Thursday awesome all - off to golf early! (((Hugs)))
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
Thank you for your service, IAH. I hope you have a lovely round of golf!
The second paragraph hit me today...am I trying to fill a void inside me? Am I spiritually empty? These are things I am going to ponder today as I have a busy day with stuff I am not wanting to deal with - I had to take off from work - which means loss of wages for the day to deal with this... so I am not happy. Coupled with waking from a great slumber that morphed into a horrifying dream! I am trying to decide if I want to post about it... perhaps later.
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"The wolf that thrives, is the one you feed." - Cherokee legend
"Hello, sun in my face. Hello you who made the morning and spread it over the fields... Watch, now, how I start the day in happiness, in kindness." Mary Oliver
Thanks IAH and Posies-I relate to this slogan and the shares. In my early days I was just a shell of a human being. I was skin on skeleton, but nothing inside. Later in life, with my current A, OMG I tried so hard to get her to stop drinking, and the harder I tried, the sicker I became. But I couldn't see myself, only her. Now with program, I can let go of trying to control others, and focus on learning to control my own thoughts and behaviors as best I can. I always remind myself, progress not perfection! Lyne
The illusion of control -- that is so true. Often when I have thought I was in control of something or someone outside myself, it was proven to be an illusion. Thank you, IAH, for your service -- and have a great day.
