The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I am always very open to the practice of inventorying myself; asking the necessary questions and listening to the responses. Solutions and more are in the responses. I have the need to inventory because of some of the things that have happened in the near past. I am inventorying my expectations it is good program work. I arrive at serious issues to consider deeply/fully because the outcomes are about how my life is going good or bad, sane or insane. I arrive at fits of laughter because I arrive at consequences so off the board as to be very very humorous. "How in the world could anyone expect to get there from here doing that!!" Recent inventorying has been about misguided intentions that for me are mostly habitual. These dance around the definition of insanity I've learned in program. "Doing the same thing over and over again while expecting different results".
Yes the 4th suggests "moral inventory" of ourselves and then leaves the tool so we can use it in other areas also.
Finally finished my 4th Step last night (Used Blueprint for Progress). Felt like it took forever! But I remind myself that it is a process... like peeling an onion really. It is not a "one and done" thing. It takes as long as it will take, and is something I can come back to over and over!
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"The wolf that thrives, is the one you feed." - Cherokee legend
"Hello, sun in my face. Hello you who made the morning and spread it over the fields... Watch, now, how I start the day in happiness, in kindness." Mary Oliver
PnP you have and are still learning well. I needed to get to know the one person I had lived my entire life with and didn't know anything about..."Me". It is a process and I have heard the metaphor of "peeling the onion" so often. My counselor for recovery used that along with so many others. Thanks for your feed back...good luck with your growth. ((((hugs))))
Jerry - I, like you, will return to the basics of this program when I find myself left of center. While we have an assortment of tools, some for me help in the moment and some for me are necessary to identify the root cause/issue within me. I do believe that each time I work the steps, more is revealed - good and bad. I am forever intrigued by the power of our HP to disclose to me those things I need to see or work on at the exact time I am able/ready. I really am grateful with that intrigue - the whole process, while not pain-free does affirm for me how small I am in this great big universe, yet how important I must be to he or she who made me, simply because I am worthy of continued growth.
As much as I am not a fan of pain and sadness, it is those moments in my journey where I appear to be most/more open to what my HP is wanting me to learn. There have been no short cuts in recovery - just one foot in front of the other, praying for his will along the way, looking for my part and finding gratitude when/where I can guides me back to the middle of the boat each/every time!
(((Hugs))) my brother - may their be an increased level of peace and joy on the other side of this mini-trip of your larger journey!
Good on you PnP - way to go and yes, yes, yes - peeling the layers back is a great analogy!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
((jerry)) I never thought of doing the 4th all over again. Mine has been one added on. I can see the benefit of doing a new one. A huge benefit I may add.
Oh I love this! Inventoring myself. With my daily journaling and myself imposed cognitive behavioral therapy that I learned watching videos and reading and now apply to myself, its basically like I am training myself like I train my dogs. And part of it, a big part of it, is being brutally honest about what I observe about myself in order to do affective self parenting and self talk. So step four is a constant companion of mine because if I am going to change my perceptions , Hence the emotions and behavior, I have to be completely, 100% honest with me in order to do that. Thank you for this very needed reminder for me to see and think about
So I read this and understand that I was wearing your shoes this morning as I told my grandson about and how I also inventory and the final question "Okay...now that you know what do you do with it?" My elder sponsor, now passed left his lessons etch on my spirit.
I appreciate this post Rose...very much. Thank you. ((((hugs))))
