The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I have never been one that suffers from depression...maybe that's why our situation carried on so long without me realizing there was a problem. The eternal optimist passed away 2 months ago though, and now I can't seem to pull myself from this depression. I really want to have a better week. I am going to my first f2f meeting, and I have my first appointment with a counselor. Beyond that, I am just busy with stuff for the kids. I just wanted some advice on detaching, and what you all do to carry on with life, have happy days, and not stay stuck in this really horrible place. I guess I just don't want everyday consumed with this hurt and depression...need a new plan. Thanks, robyn
Detachment....that is one that discussed last week A LOT. Someone was asking the same thing. What is it and how do you achieve it? There were many suggestions. One that sticks out most was someone mentioned using music to help detach. Finding that certain type of music that helps you get through the tough spots. I like to boogie. So if I listen to some boogie dancing music, it usually makes me feel better. Others talked of songs that spoke to their hearts w/the same feelings they were having. And then there was mention of the music that took you back to the past, of times that were happier. Make your pick. Maybe it will help.
Detachment is hard. I don't think I have quite grasped it myself although I am truly trying. I think my detachment will come when I make that physical detachment, moving into my own place w/the kids and leaving my husband to sort through his problems on his own.
Good luck in your search. Remember that we are here for you. Look to your HP for guidance. And find that key that will help you through this journey. God Bless
When I first came to this board I found that I wanted to be able to do everything straight away. I was practising detaching with my A without even realizing what detachment was. It is okay to crawl before you walk. You can detach yourself in many ways but basically it is about getting the focus back on you and your needs. Whilst we are concentrating on the A's behaviour we are getting sick inside. Remember the 3 c's and start with step one. Once we admit we are powerless over their drinking we can change ourselves for the better. Hope this helps a little. Luv Leo xx
I too suffer with depression. I crawl into a dark place and I cannot seem to get myself out of it. Counselors help as do antidepressants. I quit using both last year and now I feel like I am on the bottom again. I know exercise and fresh air help too. So does focusing on the good in your life and keeping a gratitude journal. I have been told the human mind has a hard time seeing the big picture when it is focusing on something small. Keep your focus on what you have that is good. These things have helped me through some rough times.
