The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
The C2C reading for March 3 speaks about the fourth step. The reading indicates that if we look inward deeply enough we may find that many of our attitudes, and actions and unrealistic, immature and childlike. It then goes on to explain what mature behavior looks like which includes: " knowing ourselves, asking for help when we need it, admitting when were wrong and making amends, excepting love from others, recognizing that I have choices and take responsibility for the ones I make, seeing that life is a blessing having an opinion without insisting that others share it, forgiving myself and others and having the courage to live one day at a time" . The reading also suggests that accepting that I'll never be finished and will always be a work in progress is a great sign of maturity as well as caring for others without having to take care of them.
This is indeed a tall order to embrace. I found that by practicing the steps, attending meetings and sharing with Al-Anon folk lead me toward a maturity that I never thought possible,.
Thank you Betty for the daily,
I'm just got finished working my 4 th step,
This is good to know about maturity ,it's not always easy being mature,as it takes practice also.
It's sunny out,And springs on its way.
Have a great day,,,,lu
Thanks for the daily and all ESH. I cherish this reading because to me it sums up alanon. What amazing goals to strive for. And although we can't be perfect, I do see progress along my journey with program. Today already feels hard with a situation at home with my sober A, and I will keep this reading in mind. Lyne
Thank you for all the ESH's. I am still struggling with asking for help when I need it. I am however aware of it and working on it. To me that says self esteem is still a major work in progress:) But, it is so much better than it was!
This reading made me think of the promises of alanon. If I read them again closer I could see how the words in the reading resemble my experiences that I have had while working this program. I will never do all these things perfectly. I am still a work in progress. Thank you Betty for your service & today's reading. Made me think.
Thank you Betty for the daily and your service. The 4th step with a trusted sponsor helped to free me from the bondage of self. It is where I identified that within me that enabled me to personalize the disease, blame the diseased and hold on tight to being right and placing blame. Meetings, literature, sponsor and the first 3 steps helped me find myself and the next few steps helped me know myself.
For me, many of the 'isms' were present before the A(s) floating into my life. I could give my idea of the reasons why, yet it makes no matter. My thinking, feeling and reacting were flat-out unhealthy and often very immature and if I wanted to have serenity and joy, I had to use this program to change that which I could - me.
Today, when life happens, I can usually (with tools) get away from looking outside me for the cause/effect. I am better able to look inside and learn and then try to carry on towards a joyous, happy life my HP wants for me. I'm grateful for Al-Anon and all that I've gained by remaining committed to growing and changing.
I might be out more than in - I got a call last night, and my mother had a slight stroke. She's in the hospital in ICU in AZ and I am planning to head that way. When I got that call, a part of me wanted to shut down and worry/cry yet the program has helped me see it's not about me. I took some minutes, collected myself, asked HP for strength and courage, called my brothers and others who need to know and went on to bed. I did not sleep well, but got up, did my morning routine, went to my meeting and began planning to go. Please send any prayers our way you can - we never know what each day brings. (((Hugs))) to all.
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
the Courage to Change and the others were very supportive readings for me this morning before going to my morning home group. It was right on, just what I needed to hear and included the truth and reality of my HP's presence in my life of recovery along with my sponsor. Yesterday I was txing my sponsor about traveling to another island to make amends to an old friend who I may of put in jeopardy along with his family regarding a serious event. While I was thinking about what to write (I haven't seen him in years) my wife walked up to me with my cell phone telling me..."it's your sponsor". Of course it was my sponsor my HP was directing me to do "first things first" so I stopped doing what I was doing and learned my sponsor would be in town early this morning and would meet me at my home group....I laughed and stopped the email.
While riding to my morning group the thought "...Except when to do so would injure them or others" came to mind and I knew my HP was directing my program along with justification so I was getting responsible feedback that set the tone for listening to my sponsors feedback which was that very possibly I had done enough regarding the amends and should leave the rest lay as is because my friend didn't raise a concern about what has happened years and years ago.
I have turned it over. HP has it. My sponsor thinks my solution is within the principles of the program and I can consider that I am following the principle of being helpful and honest with others.
So there...Cunning, Very Powerful and Baffling recovery. I bet both HP and Sponsor are smiling at the moment. Thanks for letting me share. ((((hugs))))
Thanks all - I am not travelling yet.....we are still waiting for test results and what's next for my mom which will help me/dad determine best next steps. I have spent way too much time on the phone today - restating and retelling what I know is tiring yet I know it's being of service.
I appreciate the support - I am exhausted and quasi-sad - yet I am grateful for this program allowing me to make my relationship with my mother 'right' as can be.
Great share Jerry - the power of HP and program is larger than me and each of us. Powerful miracle brother!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
You are so right on sister. It always makes me feel encouraged to be reminded of all of the times my HP using other people, places and times has clearly contacted me at it's will and directed my change.
my most recent inventory revealed a self centered risk taking personality which pretty well clearly threw light on how I directed my life back then. The alcoholic/addict and the insanity that revolved us was just fair game justification to take the spotlight off of myself however the program with all of it tools and opportunities to work it has brought about much change. Having a sponsor who sits above the disease and able to see my behaviors, thoughts, feelings and intentions and from experience bring my understanding closer to the truth is HP's gift to me...Today I can say again..."I know and know that I know" both the problem and the solution...I feel free again...free again, free again...Thank God I'm free again. ((((hugs)))) have a safe trip Sister ...prayers and love for mom and her health.
Betty thanks for sharing this this morning .. i am realizing my even wanting to put the doctor off this month (because i don't want to face the consequences of 'my past choices) is something i need to work on .. Making the appointment is Me taking back the responsibility i So want to put on 'others .. Simple but not easy .. this is new for me to see .. thanks again
