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Miracles In Progress 12 Step Recovery Forums -> Al-Anon Family Group -> Al-Anon Family Group -> I keep hoping time will bring change in her.......bur know the only one I can change is ME
Post Info TOPIC: I keep hoping time will bring change in her.......bur know the only one I can change is ME
lgnutah


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I keep hoping time will bring change in her.......bur know the only one I can change is ME
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I have lived with the predictable pattern of my AD's disease long enough that I am getting better at setting protective boundaries for myself.  (She does not live with me, she lives a couple of hours away). 

If I see that a text she has sent is becoming verbally abusive/incoherent, I delete it without reading the rest of it.  If she calls me slurring, blaming the whole world for all her bad decisions, or when she is talking in "word salad", I tell her I have to go (she usually can't hear me anyway and just keeps talking) and I tell her I am not able to listen anymore and just set the phone down and eventually she realizes I'm not listening and hangs up her phone.  If she calls me back repeatedly, I just turn my phone off.

But, I am honest when I tell you that I still hope, every single day, that she will start wanting to make better choices for her own mental and physical health.



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hotrod


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((ignutah)) You are not alone being a mother to an alcoholic child is a painful experience. Prayers on the way

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Betty

THE HIGHEST FORM OF WISDOM IS KINDNESS

Talmud
Iamhere


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(((Ignutah))) - I too can relate to the way the disease affects us when it's our kid(s). Good on you for setting up boundaries and there is nothing wrong with having hope. We truly do not know what is in store for anyone today or tomorrow so hope is normal. I do know that when I wonder if my hope is 'fantasy' or not, I lean into the program and find comfort in where I am and what is - just for today. Great share - thanks!

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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging.  Pause before assuming.  Pause before accusing.  Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret.  ~~~~  Lori Deschene

 

 
Lyne


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Ignutah-Hugs being sent as my son has also struggled with addiction. And my spouse is recently sober . You have excellent boundaries established for yourself. Bravo. It is important that we survive and I try to enjoy my life thanks to program. Are things exactly the way I want them? Heck no. But I pray each morning and ask God for what might be better. I ask Him to bless my troubled family members. And as said earlier, we have no crystal ball so I lean on HP for help and hope, Lyne

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Lyne
serenity47


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I pray for all the alcoholic individuals and their families to find sobriety and peace. My daughter has struggled with addiction and there always seems to be something not right in her life. It is hard to witness them struggling. I will never give up hope that she will one day have the life she deserves to have.

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Miracles In Progress 12 Step Recovery Forums -> Al-Anon Family Group -> Al-Anon Family Group -> I keep hoping time will bring change in her.......bur know the only one I can change is ME