I am trying to see the positives-thank you god, the alcoholic is getting crazier, and more insane when drinking. It just means he is nearing the end, and I can move more into recovery! I say, let him go nuts, but I need to remove myself and give him the space to go completely insane. Have at er. hope it makes you feel wonderful. I can not help you. I just have to keep my safety first and foremost. I hope the demons and witches you seem to see when intoxicated do not haunt your sober days!! 

I have to think, its his problem, and there is nothing I or anyone can do for him. He has to get help! I just have to keep my distance, and stay as safe as possible, get away the moment he picks up, get to safety as I know what will happen and what will be said. Its a constant round and round. My safety is first and foremost! 

Get out of the house, I need to find a way to get out of the house as much as I can, get out, get out of the house! Get away, get away from the crazies, away from the alcoholic. I have not said anything today about his drinking,. What is the use? will not change a darn thing. I am learning, god I still need help, get me out of the house, get me out of this relationship, let your will be done, help me! Help me to get a safe home to live in. Help me, to live in a safe and happy home. I need it. I want it. I need to live alone for awhile. To live where I am safe and secure. God help me to find a safe and secure home where I can live in peace. Let your will be done! Amen. 

Thanks for letting me share this.