Today's reading discusses our willingness to people please when we arrived at Al-Anon.  Many of us come with the thought that it was our job to make those around us happy.  The writer discusses having 'followship' skills instead of 'leadership' skills.  We learn through Concept Nine, which states in part, "Good personal leadership at all service levels is a necessity."

After time in program, the writer was willing to be of service, yet still burdened by fear of mistakes or failure.  Other members suggested that everyone makes mistakes, and it's not a bad thing!  This person felt loved and led by other Al-Anon members who were willing to guide the writer to learn and grow at her own pace.

As it happens, with time and practice, confidence in skills and abilities flourished.  The writer's leadership style is different from what she knew before being in an Alcoholic controlling environment.  We learn to simply share our ESH with others and provide support and encouragement for them to do their best.  "Let it Begin With Me" - kind, loving and gentle leadership in action is what Al-Anon is all about.

The Thought for the Day - "Al-Anon encourages me to develop as a leader in my Higher Power's time, in my Higher Power's way.

Quote for the Day - "In Al-Anon we learn we can take charge of our lives.  We are the leaders of ourselves."  -  from The Concepts -- Al-Anon's Best Kept Secret (p. 20)

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The reading discusses that she came from a disease experience with an authoritarian style in her home and her experience helped her find a gentle way to be a leader.  I can so relate to this - more from my FOO than from my AH.  As a child, growing up with two untreated ACoA parents, we were not allowed to make mistakes and there was a specific order with exact directions to every task.  It was stifling, and undesirable....yet - as I became an adult, I picked up many of these habits.

I truly thought that barking orders, directing others and then getting angry when they did not do as I wished or ordered was adulting and/parenting.  What I've since learned is that it's controlling and poor leadership.  This also affects confidence, self-worth and self-esteem --- all of which were affected for me.  

In Al-Anon, I learned to be imperfect, embrace differences and lead by examples and action instead of words.  I also learned that sharing my experience is far more helpful and loving that telling others what they should do or could do.  It is in program that I have found a more gentle, loving spirit that encourages others instead of ordering others.....so grateful!!!

Have a lovely Thursday MIP family!  I delivered my little people to daycare and am headed to the golf course shortly.  Softball last night - needed long pants and long sleeves - not a typical September in my world.....love window weather - make it a great day!!