The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
The ODAT reading for July 2 speaks about experiencing the joy of living. It points out that, new members are astonished to learn that many of the happiest people at the meeting were also burdened with a wall black despair. when they first found program . It was Al-Anon that brought the joy of living as well as hope and confidence into the open, ready to be used to help others
The sooner we are willing to dig into the program and use the 12 steps and slogans and daily readings and give up the need to feel sorry for ourselves, we will find peace .We will learn to develop the priceless gift of serenity, through acceptance of life as we embrace the good in every day.
The Quote is "I will only be able to help others when I have allowed Al-Anon to clear up my own view of my problems. Until I am impelled to share with others what i get from this program, my progress will be limited."
This is indeed a fellowship of equals and I find that I grow in compassion, empathy and love as I share my ESH with others
Well even in the throes of this horrible patch of "bad karma" I am finding joy in my sports, dogs, friends, I MAKE room for joy and fun....and yep...i may feel like victim for a while, but then I realize that I'm not alone, and I can shake it off, first i gotta vent and get pissed, then i hunker down and do what I can to make good energy for myself with self care, inventory as to why I am feeling a certain way and working the program.....this is my only therapy so i am gonna use it ....ALL of it...Betty you are a true inspiration for so many of us....I am so so glad you are here.................BIG Polar bear sized hugs to you, sweet lady
I guess prior to al-anon I believed my experience was so crazy that no-one would ever be able to understand it. Ergo, my pain was also unique because it was the pain of being alone and incapable of being understood. Finding that I was not so unique freed me from the need to wallow in self pity; my experiences and feelings weren't so crazy that no-one could understand, in fact they were common enough that sharing about my journey could actually be helpful to other people!
Al-anon offers so many options that I never knew existed, back when the only answer was "I'm broken".
Thanks Betty
I still recall my first meeting... our meeting place shifted around a bit , over time- but I still remember the street...
I was wearing gumboots, with the tops turned down. And that was where my spirits were, really. I still wear gumboots these days- for my summer job, but not to meetings!
Alanon does give me treasured memories. Some of my family memories were okay- but not the majority. That was why I wound up at a meeting. I began as the youngest member at the meeting and ended up being the oldest- over the decades. Or, the second oldest really...
I was young and idealistic... I did have hopes and dreams-- which had not surfaced, in reality... I learned to exercise these, over time...
Joy??? Yes... great moments of joy... and success... maybe not the success the world had in mind. Behind closed doors- certainly... and out into the wide world... most times...
Before Al Anon my life story was filled with self pity. I remember a friend once saying she couldn't believe someone who had a childhood like mine had ended up so seemingly normal and capable. That comment was a source of pride for me. I focused all my attention on the negative and that is a default I can always fall back into if I'm not careful. Al Anon has taught me how to focus on the joy in life. I've learned to accept my past instead of asking "why me". I've been able to pull positive memories about my childhood out of cherish them instead of dwelling on the bad stories. My sponsor really draws on my sense of humour and fun and she reminds me all the time to have some fun and so I do. This program has brought joy back into my life and I cherish every little piece of it I get. I sit back for a moment and appreciate all the small wonderful things in my life. Things I didn't see before. I am so grateful to the program for that.
Before Al Anon my life story was filled with self pity. I remember a friend once saying she couldn't believe someone who had a childhood like mine had ended up so seemingly normal and capable. That comment was a source of pride for me. I focused all my attention on the negative and that is a default I can always fall back into if I'm not careful. Al Anon has taught me how to focus on the joy in life. I've learned to accept my past instead of asking "why me". I've been able to pull positive memories about my childhood out of cherish them instead of dwelling on the bad stories. My sponsor really draws on my sense of humour and fun and she reminds me all the time to have some fun and so I do. This program has brought joy back into my life and I cherish every little piece of it I get. I sit back for a moment and appreciate all the small wonderful things in my life. Things I didn't see before. I am so grateful to the program for that.
ohhhh you are so not alone....just wanted to say "I RELATE" especially if I am not careful, I can get on the self pity crap and then put out negative energy because I am feeding the negative...I have to work program each and every day in some ways and like Betty says to SHARE my esh wiht others....first I gotta take good care of me so I am not useless to my fellows in recovery, needing support, too.......Glad U R here, KT...
Great reading today and lovely shares. Thanks as always Betty for your service!!!
Before Al-Anon for me, I was absolutely insane - more than I ever thought as I truly deep down believed I was the only sane one in my home. I was always stressed, worried and overwhelmed and switched back and forth between dread/depression and deep-seated anger - at my 'people' as well as God.
I had a preconception that Al-Anoners spent time at meetings bashing their A. Ironically enough, many Al-Anoners believe that AA members spend their time bashes their loved ones. In both cases, it's just not been my experience and I found others who felt what I felt yet found solutions and used to act as I acted and didn't any longer.
To say I was intrigued is an understatement. I did not understand (denial and ego) how they could live with someone who pickled their mind most days, left huge messes, wasted $$ like to was tap water and "lived and let live". I truly expected to leave my marriage and bury my children and neither of these events have come true for me.
Instead I found others who were willing to surrender their old ways, and fight for a new normal. One where they put self first and focused much of their energy on their own mind, body, heart and soul. I saw people who could make eye contact (I could not ever as I was full of shame/anger/dread) and tell me there's a better way to live.
I am beyond words grateful that I was crazy enough, surrendering seemed like the logical next step. I am grateful I was willing to do the work and pray for the willingness when I stumbled. I am grateful I got through my pain and sadness and found beautiful joy and peace on the other side. Today, I find it largely upsetting when I am distracted from my self-care and my recovery. I will go to any length to keep my sanity and serenity - what a gift....a real bonifed self-advocate! Thank you Al-Anon, MIP and all for giving me back my joy!!
I had so much 'fun' today that I did not even find time to come here until almost bed-time! Ha.....
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
Great share David....I have to say that I believe I can learn a ton from the small ones in my life! They teach me something new each time I am with them! (((Hugs)))
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
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