The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
my dear sister was admitted to hospital last night
cancer has spread to her liver and possibly other parts...this is NOT looking good...Thank you program for giving me the ability to reach out to her when I did back 2 years ago or whevenever it was because even tho I hurt like hell now, its better than to not have reconcilled with and shared love with her...
I am going to get up and out of this house and DO something...hit some tennis balls...groceries....get my mind off this for a while b/c sitting here, thinking of the worst is not productive....I will cry tonight...allow my emotions...feel the grief for someone who appears to be drifting to her death but Iwill work tomorrow and Friday because my folks need me and I need the diversion
I can't help her now...on her bed is my special "sisters" blanket that I sent her...she snuggles with it every night, but tonight it sits on her bed alone....I am glad she loves it...it was my way of hugging her long distance....
my heart is heavy but I have folks to lean on ...my sponsor and my dearest friend in all my life, I will call her tonight.....
Love to all....Remember this!!!! Life is tentative...Temporary......If you love someone?? Tell them...If you owe an amend??? MAKE it...Don't wait!!! I almost let our ugly past rob me of this reconcilliation that has been nothing but a blessing and confirmation that her love for me (the baby sister) goes deep...real deep..I would never have known that had I let my ego be in charge...
She is a fighter, but this does not look good at all...its in her liver and other parts according to my niece whom I also have been mother too...
Niece just tested me, liver lesions, deydration and very very weak and frail...her health is worsening ...I don't want to lose her, but don't want her to suffer either......STEP ONE STEP TWO STEP THREE here we come
Oh (((Rose))) - sending loving thoughts to you and your sister as well as prayers for peace for you both. So glad to hear you've got a 'plan' for self-care and support. We are here as best we can be for you! Huge (((Hugs)))...
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
talked with my niece who has been more my daughter as I raised her, and basically they are letting her go home tomorrow with the cancer all over her liver as doc. said, so basically, keep her comfortable b/c she is at a place where there is never going to be anything more than a few good days here and there, then it will be over with....when?? who knows, but even before I found this out, I had this nagging feeling that I was losing my sister.....so I will upload fun stuff for her to view on her facebook page, be there if she wants to talk, WHEN she is able to talk and do what I can to be of support....
Thank you all for your wonderful thoughts and prayers....I am so glad I came back here...I truly missed some of you and I am getting to see some very nice newer folks with great posts...
What would I do without my program??? Don't want to think about it...
