The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Today's C2C speaks of the fifth step-where we admit our wrongdoings to another person... and how intimidating it can be to contemplate admitting our shortcomings to another person, especially when we have poured time and energy into concealing what we see as terrible flaws in our characters, fearing that we would be utterly rejected if they became known.
However when we do finally share our"terrible" secrets, perhaps with a sponsor or another trusted al-anon friend, we can be surprised to discover that they and many others once kept the same "terrible secrets". We are not so unique, nor as terrible as we think we are!
"Deep down I had the nagging knowledge that there would be no real relief from myself until I could bring my problem out in the open and talk to somebody else about it" (As We understood...)
***
I know I find myself freed of a burden just about every time I hear someone else admit to a wrong-doing in the safe space that is al-anon. Yet I still tend to assume that I am "worse" than everyone else and that what I have to say will be shocking, or weird. But when I consider how liberating it is for me to hear the honest shares of others, it reminds me that perhaps candor has more value than simply sating my own desire to purge...perhaps it also benefits others.
What a gift to find a safe space and a safe format for uncovering the dark, scary and sometimes crippling truths we hide about ourselves.
Thank you MissM for your service and today's reading. The first time I learned I was to spill my beans to another human being, I said "OMG there's no way I'm doing THAT!" Well I eventually did face my fear of breaking my isolation and it has helped me move to acceptance of myself. Today I'm grateful I can safely share my life situation in the loving arms of my All-Anon family.
__________________
- Carrie
Stress is caused by being 'here' but wanting to be 'there'. Eckhart Tolle
Hi Ms. M. Thanks for your service. The 4 and 5th Step did appear extremely daunting when I first embarked on recovery many years ago. Praying for courage and securing a supportive sponsor helped to ease my anxiety and gave me the courage to proceed. I found it was true, alanon is not a self improvement program but a self discovery program.
Working these steps helped me to see and accept all the negavie tools that I had developed to cope . These tools hide my positive attributes and by releasing them I set myself free to respond to life with kindness, compassion, gratitude,wisdom courge and love . My self esteema nd self worth were resptored and I grew.
Today I can take a "fearless" inventory because I know that we are all imperfect human beings, and if I uncover a negative I have the tools to replace it.
Hope you had a grand day. Thanks for sharing the journey
