The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
My A-exbf has been sober for over two months now. He will die if he drinks because of his liver, so he remains in recovery. Now, he has pain pills. The pills are fairly strong compared to what someone else might get prescribed. He is taking two at a time, and yesterday he took five of them. They are not prescribed that way, and this happens every time he gets sober. He has been in a couple of car accidents and complains of migraines, and now he can say his stomach and side is hurting from his liver. He was suppose to go to pain management, and some how he got around that and got another prescription. I got annoyed even though it is not my problem. I was not angry just disappointed. I had to get off the phone with him before I said something I might regret. In the past he has taken to many pills, and had to be admitted into the hospital. I am in pain management, and I cannot really say anything about him needing the medication but it should be monitored. I can only hope that the doctors will require him to go in the future. Otherwise he is doing alright, he lives with his sister, and she does not drink and has been helping him.
-- Edited by shrnp on Friday 31st of March 2017 09:25:15 AM
((Shrnp)) It certainly sounds as if you are detaching with love and using the powerful tool of MYOB. This is not an easy road that we travel and I'm sending positive thoughts and prayers for you and your ex partner. Keep on keeping on..
Thank you ((shrnp)) for your ESH and positive thoughts headed your way. I love your use of the tools Al-Anon provides us to mind our own business. Take extra care of you today.
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- Carrie
Stress is caused by being 'here' but wanting to be 'there'. Eckhart Tolle
How kind of you to be there. In my family, everyone ran away, nobody could watch it. Two of my in-laws wanted to die MORE than they wanted to change and so they did.
I developed faith that their death came as a relief for them. having made a mess of this life, Father God will give them more chances. We will all be winners eventually.
(((shrnp))) - as I read you share, I was reminded of how powerless we really, really are. I heard worry in your share and also sadness. I can relate and when my mind goes there, one of the best tools I've found in this program is a gratitude list focusing on what's working in my life. It really helps me stop focusing on what's wrong.
I did not realize before recovery that even with this disease, there is a ton that happens one day at a time that is beautiful, great and positive. The program has given me the ability to work on my own attitude and outlook which has in fact aided my recovery and reality. I'm sending you and him some prayers and positive thoughts - keep leaning into the program....there is always hope and help there!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
Thanks for your replies and support everyone. It really helps to express myself. I do not have to many people I can discuss this with. My family usually has an " I told you so" attitude, and I can understand that. I normally keep a lot of things to myself. I am thankful for the Alanon fellowship and my HP.
2HP, I wanted to run away when all of this began. It would be so easy. Luckily, I am not a family member and that has protected me from the ICU and things like that when my A first got sick. God works in mysterious ways. I do not have a car right now either, and as much as I would like one, that has given me an excuse to not have to go and see my A very often.
Iamhere, thanks for mention the gratitude list. It is so easy to dwell on the negative. I will have to remember that next time I am feeling overwhelmed.
