The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Well were in a new limbo. Its still a better one than the old one and im grateful for the one day at a time philosophy.
Actually there's not a lot of choice, im flying by the seat of my pants.
Deep down, I have complete faith that the God of my understanding has me and my kids with ease. Closer to the surface, the what ifs are buzzing about.
Theres no room right now for anything but the next right thing, and the courage to change what i can while handing over what I can't. There is no plan B. This is it as it unfolds. Its all a bit scary, but at the same time, its like my head is being lifted to look and see from my own unique perspective and discover that I am not less than, simply because i have less of. Eureka.
It was financial security that kept me stuck, and my own will and desperation to somehow minimise risk until i just literally could not take anymore abuse and disrespect.
There is no way we are going back.
Having said that, practical matters do not appear to be vastly in our favour. Me, im a believer in spirit reigning over everything else, so please keep us in your prayers. We so appreciate and need them.
We literally do not know what tomorrow will bring, but for today, we are warm, we are safe, we are fed.
What an amazing program you are working. Its inspiring to me. Your awareness about what kept you stuck is brilliant, the financial pull is a strong one but its all hinging on the unhinged state of affairs. You and your kids are in my prayers and your higher power has got you and everything is exactly as it should be. Your doing great, keep on keeping on x
Hinging on an unhinged state of affairs..... No truer words were spoken my friend. Thankyou for the support And encouragement. One wonders if they're brave or insane at times like this but i already feel alive again. Misery is a heavy cloak. So not my shade!
((A41)) The C2C reading for today speaks about having the courage to live life. It suggests that by taking risks and 'stop playing' it safe" we can uncover our true potential.
The reading presents a quote from Helen Keller that :" life is aa "great adventure or it is nothing "
I love your program and know that one day at a time ,you will move into a safe and secure place.
Super big hugs to you today! I understand where you are at. I was financially dependent on my XAH for 16 years and hadn't worked outside of the home. But, the emotional turmoil and abuse and drinking and DUI and all the craziness became too much for me. I had to take a chance on ME and my abilities. It's been a scary ride sometimes but I've been out now for well over 2 years and it was the best decision I made. Supporting you in your time of transition and praying for God's protection over you and yours.
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Never grow a wishbone where your backbone ought to be!
Wow a4l hugs to you and prayers will be going up for you. It was so amazing to me to read this share this morning! I too have little kids and am mainly staying because I don't think I can afford to be without his paycheck. (And we are in no physical danger). But his verbal treatment of me is getting increasingly aloof and disrespectful and for the first time he spoke rudely to our son while drunk. So his disease is going downhill fast. I seriously considered the latest incident being the last one but just need financial help so much and the financial picture just keeps getting worse not better! I will be rooting for you.
a4l I really admire your bravery. Things will work out, you just have to keep putting one foot in front. There are some really great people out in the world if we only give them and ourselves a chance. Sending prayers your way.
It helped me so much to keep using a mantra or affirmation in desperate times. the mantra changed over the years, but basically it is something that keeps my mind on God and not the fear. My sponsor was also in the AA fellowship and had given me a big book from the start. My very first mantra was from the big book, the lines about fear... something like
" just to the extent that I do as God would have me do...
and humbly rely on Him...
Will He enable me to match calamity with serenity."
I must have said that a million times a day. And it worked. I learned to trust that God is my only security. That no matter what happens, I must always affirm and believe this truth, that only God can help me.
Never think you cannot overcome. Never let fear gain entrance. As a child of the One running this entire universe, you are entitled to everything good. My power is God, I do not believe in any other power. It is in you also, my friend. Believe it.
Sending tons of prayers and thoughts your way A4L - your program and courage will get you through one day at a time! (((Hugs)))
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
