Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene

Schnunkell · Newbie

Need some advice , I don't know what to do ?

hotrod · ~*Service Worker*~

Hello Schnunkell Welcome You are not alone and there is hope. Alcoholism is a chronic progressive dreadful disease over which we are powerless, Alanon is a recovery program for family members who have lived with or are living with the insanity and need the support and understanding of people who truly understand. They will offer comfort and support as you develop new tools to live by I understand that you do not have face to face meetings in your community so I suggest that you attend our ON LINE meetings.

Here is he schedule and web address

http://www.12stepforums.net/chatroom2.html

Al-Anon Family Group
Meeting/Chat Room

Meetings
9 AM EST Mon-Fri
9 PM EST Mon-Sat
10 AM EST Sat & Sun
7 PM EST Sunday

Iamhere · ~*Service Worker*~

Welcome to MIP schnunkell - so glad you found us and glad that you reached out. As Betty suggests, this disease is powerful and progressive. It's considered a family disease as those of us who live with and/or love an alcoholic often develop distorted thinking and become a hostage to the disease.

We don't really give advice and Betty has directed you to the online meetings here....they are a great start and perfect for those who can't get to local meetings. We do suggest if there is abuse in your living situation that you protect yourself however you can/need to - know who to call should you need assistance, keep a bag packed in the car in case you need to 'go' in a hurry, etc.

I would also suggest that you go to YouTube and see if you can find any speakers that you can relate to. Speaker meetings in the beginning for me were very helpful to understand we truly are not alone and there is hope and help in recovery.

Keep coming back - (((Hugs)))...

luv123 · Senior Member

Welcome-so sorry for what u are going through--u truly are not alone. I agree with the suggestions already given. There is a lot of hope--so many of us have lived through similar challenges and come out the other side strong in our Al-anon tools, understanding all the choices that are available. One of the first tools I heard which helped me with violent outbursts was "learn to detach"so I read all the literature on detachment and starte getting clear on how I might apply it to my situation--also I heard Q-tip--quit taking it (the disease) personally. It felt so personal, but feelings aren't facts--I learned how to do self care regardless of what the Alc. decided he was doing. I sometimes chose not to read texts--I learned knew responses to old situations.

If u can call the U.S. at all there are also phone meetings:

Another place to turn beyond local meetings is the phone bridge--it is a U.S. number available 6-8 times each day for ppl to have a conference meeting on. Meetings are generally very well attended & organized. When u call in u will be muted, but the prompt will explain how to un-mute if u choose to share. Sometimes there are 100 ppl on the meeting calling in from all over the world.

Here is

part of schedule-there are more meetings listed online &

for that or more details on the specific mtng topics go to

al

-anon.org click on find a meeting, then click phone meetings.

There are several phone bridge numbers. The one I am most familiar with is 712-432-8733 pin #52639... .... (Eastern standard time) daily 6a, 9a, 12pm, 4p, 8p, 10p , many nights at midnight (with a few exceptions on weekends sat/ sunday 8 am & 10am rather than at 9, I believe...)BUT for ALL the meeting times you can also call the 712-432-8733 just press this pin # instead: (keypad numbers that correspond with the word TIMES)

The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.

Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene