Today's reading discusses watching a colony of bees.  The writer is at first a bit intimidated and scared of the buzzing and frenzied motion, but is reminded that a sting is less likely if distance is kept between self and the action.  Noted - "If I chose to maintain a safe distance from a dangerous situation, I would be fine."

So is how the act of detaching works.  We have the choice - when we sense a situation is dangerous to our physical, mental or spiritual well-being, we can put extra distance between ourselves and the situation.  We can choose to physically depart.  We can choose to limit our emotional involvement.  Lastly, we can put spiritual space between us and another person's disease or behavior.

We are not choosing to stop loving another, but instead acknowledging the risks to self and making choices for self-protection.

Today's reminder ---  Now I know how to end an argument by simply refusing to participate, to turn to my Higher Power for help with whatever I'm powerless to change, to say, "No", when I mean o, and to step back from insanity rather than diving into it.  Detachment is a loving gift I continue to give to myself and to others.

Today's quote ---  "If a man carries his own lanter, he need not fear darkness."  ~~  Hasidic saying ~~

___________________________________________________________

Detachment as a concept was very hard for me to grasp.  After all, my qualifiers were not of adult age when they first encountered issues with the disease, and I strongly felt it was my job to protect them from 'harm'.  As long as I held tight to this thinking pattern, I was separating from the rewards of working this program.

Others who came before me showed me that detaching meant to protect me, not punish them.  Most of my reactions before Al-Anon were more of a, "I'll show you........................I'll hurt me!" - meaning that they were punitive and all felt the wrath of me.

I learned in recovery that detaching did not have anything to do with words or reactions, but rather had to do with lovingly stepping away from danger.  When I am feeling off-center or uncomfortable at any point in my day,  I can pause (a form of detaching), ask God for guidance and then respond or not - I get to choose.

I no longer have to be right.  I no longer have to be loud to be heard.  I no longer have to repeat myself.  I no longer have to JADE - Justify, Argue, Defend or Explain.  I can say my truth calmly and then align my actions accordingly.  I no longer attach my self worth to how others act, speak, think or react.

The program gave me back the gift of me and detaching helps me to keep me.  So grateful for the gift of recovery, our program and all of you today.  Happy Thursday all - make it a great day!