I love God. And as i get older its blatantly obvious that im loved and beleived in right back. So I've been stressing out about work and independence and non utilised talents, generally feeling like crap and worried. Yet at the same time, I feel like im right where im meant to be. Anyway. I got the urge to look for part time work and got a bit discouraged flicking through all the stuff i can't do for whatever reason. Then i came across an ad looking for writers. It said call anytime. I felt sick and motivated at the same time. I did call and talked myself into a contractor position with two pieces of work right now. I have to pinch myself. I was very straight up and honest with the boss. I feel like everything I've been taught is now perfectly aligned. Never lie, an old boss said. Another honed my writing skill and taught me mass production under pressure. Another showed me beleif and it was to my regret that i lacked it in myself and wasn't entirely honest nor commited. Now here i am again feeling wiser, calmer and grateful. Work is a gift to me, I'm so tickled and will do my best to utilise my gifts. Those pesky ants are still scuttling but if HP sees fit to gift me, i trust that its because i am capable and trustworthy. Also, its work from home. I told my little daughter before this eventuated that mummy will be going back to work next year. Her eyes filled with tears and her little voice squeaked " but who will be here mummy? I will miss you! ". I was deeply touched: sometimes working on the mother production line its easy to feel no one cares about you. In that moment, I knew I was very loved indeed. Thanks for reading.