The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Today's page in One Day at a Time in AlAnon challenges us to try something: Cut fear out of our thoughts for one day, today. How? Remember: 1) What happened yesterday is done. 2) Most of what we dread doesn't happen. 3) Anything that does we can handle with the help of our higher power.
This is a new day, we have the power to make it a good one if we decide to. Reminder: If we truly live one day at a time, today need not be burdened with thoughts of yesterday or worries of tomorrow. Replace fears (tomorrow) and regrets (yesterday) with gratitude and positive activities (today).
"I recall the words of an old ditty that said: 'never trouble trouble till trouble troubles you.'"
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The first time I tried this, I was astounded at how many times I caught myself feeling fearful about something...just in the first hour! This opened my eyes to how I was allowing my thoughts to take away my serenity. By immediately shutting down worries of tomorrow's 'what ifs', I made huge progress in keeping fear out of my thoughts.
I find myself trying to sneak in worry about tomorrow under the false label of "responsible contingency planning". I have to ruthlessly shut these thoughts down, and remember the key to making this work: reliance and trust in my higher power...things will work out without my interference, one way or another, they always do.
I may have to make adjustments, but if so, my hp will be there to help me when it is time. It is also loving and respectful to others if I allow them to find their way with the help of their hp. Now, back to today. Repeat...I am so grateful for the guidance
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Paul
"...when we try to control others, we lose the ability to manage our own lives." - Paths to Recovery
Hi Paul Thanks for sharing your thoughts on this crucial recovery tool. I love how subtle alanon is in urging us to simply"live one day at a time"by letting go of worry about the future and regrets from the past. The Sanskrit poem "Look to this Day " really impressed this fact deep within my being.
When you spoke of fear driving your actions i could so identify because I too was amazed to discover how "fear" ruled my life. Alanon gave me a belief in a Power greater than myself so that when fear entered, I prayed for courage and acted truting HP would guide my actions. It works!!! Most importantly, living one day at a time with HP is the answer to all my fears.
Thank you for your share on this today. For me it is timely as I feel I have gone backward a bit with some feeling of anxiety over a situation which I cannot control or change. Remembering the past is back there and most of what we dread doesn't actually happen is a big help for me today. Thanks for your service
Good morning to all and thanks to each of you for your ESH. Paul - thank you also for your service and the daily.
I am one who arrived thinking I was strong, smart, fearless, all-knowing. As the fog began to clear, and I began to see my real self, it became apparent that most of my reactive words, thoughts and actions were all about fear. As my confidence returned and my spiritual journey strengthened, my fear has become less and less.
If I had not completely surrendered my ego, owned my powerlessness and stopped focusing on all that was going on around me, I would still be bitter and full of fear. I love that I can see it today, own it, and make a decision to do different/better. Such a gift to be able to pause long enough to hear the crazy-making my brain tries to bring forward and turn it over to God aware that he's already in charge of the outcome.
Happy Wednesday to each and all. Off to a meeting today and one more trip to the store for necessary items....(((Hugs))) - thanks for being a part of my program!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
Thanks for sharing, Paul!
Spent the morning feeling anxiety over the snowstorm I am currently stuck in and how AW would handle me not being able to return today as planned. Hopped on here because, as much as I would like to, I cannot make the snow stop, the roads better, or the daylight longer. Driving is not safe right now, and I shouldn't do it. What a needed reminder to appreciate today for what it is, Focus my attention on decisions that are good for me today, and look to myself for agreement about my decisions. I plan to enjoy the remainder of the day and the snow, and hope that tomorrow will bring better roads.
Happy Wednesday, everyone!
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Skorpi
If you are depressed, you are living in the past. If you are anxious, you are living in the future. If you are at peace, you are living in the present. - Lao Tzu
Thanks, all for your ESH and well wishes! I'm 10 hours in on my focused efforts to keep fear out of my thoughts, and am so grateful for the strength and guidance of the program and my hp. As each of you described, remembering our small place in the big happenings around us is an immense help. Glad to be sharing the journey together, best wishes for shopping, travel, and gatherings to all
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Paul
"...when we try to control others, we lose the ability to manage our own lives." - Paths to Recovery
Thank you for this great reminder. In the past, I remember seeing a slogan "No Fear" on t-shirts, etc. I thought it was a slogan for people who do extreme sports, like skydiving.
As I have learned, for some of us, sometimes, getting through every ordinary day can be an extreme sport ... and we can use the "No Fear" slogan too.
Yup, fear is at the root of many of the things that don't work for me -- fear of loss, which is attachment. I learned this in al-anon and as another said, sometimes it amazes me how deep that fear is. I used to have fears of losing material things (my house, my job, a plate if I loaned it to someone) -- I've really been able to let that sort of fear go, but I still have fear of losing status -- like losing face and appearing foolish/dumb/not in control; I have fear of losing other people's attention. I can recognize these fears thanks to my program -- and when I feel them I can use the "facts not feelings" tool, as well as turn it over to HP -- the only attention and appreciation I really need come from my HP, who gives them unconditionally. This page is a great reminder of how I want to live my life today. THank you for sharing on it.
