The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
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level.
I'm not into the br,gf thingy again and for sure not never into the blind dating games,I never liked .
freinds sure try to know what's best for us single women,
freinds try hard to fix me up with somebody,
the answers been no,no,no
im not ready for dating,etc
im presently working my steps.
with god,myself,step work and sponsor I feel my life is complete until further notice,im sure another year or maybe 2 years.
maybe never.
one never knows what the future holds for us each .
my freinds are all alanoners,without any recovery,like I was before my steps,I'm changing.
i find it really hard to make my freinds understand that I'm really not ready,not interested ,so my ? Is how do I get this across them without being or getting ill ,or hurting their feelings .
as it's easy coming here to talk about it,cause we all know the truths of that beginning another relationship after getting out of all the toxic ones..................hugs ,full of love today .....and always.....lu
Try using it as an "announcement" in a meeting where it is usually asked of us at the end of the meeting. I wouldn't have a problem doing that or hearing it from another meeting brother or sister. (((hugs)))
Let me rephrase that my freinds are not alanoners,but have lived with an a all their lives as well,
And their thinking is the same as my thinking was always to get into another relationship,jump back in,try it one more time no matter how many times it didn't work that we need a man.not my case anymore thank gosh,not that I'm. Bitter or any of the such just that I'm working my program,I'm in recovery from all my old ways of thinking and doing things,kinda like I'm underconstruction ,lol,till further notice..............
LU this may be good practice in validating yourself and stating your decisions. It is ok to keep an open mind on this subject and keep showing up HP wants all the good for you and you are doing well. Listen to the still small voice within.
Aloha Jerry ty for your great insight toward this I call diff.sit.thats gonna have to be addressed from time to time.my thinking anyway.
And thank you sweet Betty ,like always great wisdom.,hp does or is working in me and through me every min.i can feel his spirit strong at times.
LU - there is no shame in speaking your truth...I of course am unavailable, but have had many suggest a variety of social activities that just are not my cup of tea. I can clearly state, Thanks for the invite, I am not really interested right now. You don't have to say any more or any less. They own their reactions to your truth, not you.
I tend to get flabbergasted when I try to JADE my truth. Al-Anon has taught me I don't have to - I can just say, "Yes" or "No" and don't have to add any other words.
You got this!! (((Hugs)))
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
Thank you IAH,yes I beleive I have got it,
Just some tend to catch us off guard so to speak,and have the gentleman waiting out in the car or their home ,done set it all up for a meet,and I'm not informed,right,that's not right,it does happen like that,I've just got to stand firm on my grounds,
I think I'm more afraid of myself that I might just like this person,and don't even need it or want it right now while I'm in. The middle of my step work,and even afterwards,that's been a huge pet peeve of mine most my life is relationships,overlapping relationships back to back all very toxic,so no Im not ready and my picker outer is broken ,has been broken for sometime now like years,so that's not hard to understand I don't think,they see me living alone and automatically got somebody for me to meet,lol.im fine .loveing it,alone is where my hp wants me to be right now.