The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
On the topic of fear (fitting on this day!), today's author admits that that was the primary emotion driving many decisions. When anything happened to alter an expected outcome, fears of the worst possible outcomes spurred panic, resulting in a crazy flurry of actions intended to ward off various imagined disasters.
The author found a much better alternative to being controlled by fear: turn fears over to a higher power, accept powerlessness over outcomes, and move forward.
Today's Reminder: Make use of AlAnon's spiritual solution for relief from fear by turning to a higher power of our understanding. This is sure to be a more peaceful, sane solution than taking panicked actions that often include trying to control things we can't.
"That the birds of worry and care fly above your head, this you cannot change. But that they build nests in your hair, this you can prevent." ~ Chinese Proverb
****************
I can well relate to the hold that fear can have on thoughts and actions, as it has been a prime driver for much of my life. Most of what I feared never came about, yet that never stopped me from reaching outside of my circle to change people and things to match what I thought 'should be'.
I did not hold a higher power concept before I came to AlAnon, and initially struggled to develop and incorporate one into my recovery. Turning my fears over to my higher power, however, has allowed me to experience a deep, spiritual peace for the first time in my life. I'm so glad I hung in there...
Once again I have witnessed the difference between trying to tackle life challenges my way, with my tools, versus the guidance and tools of AlAnon and my higher power...I am very grateful
__________________
Paul
"...when we try to control others, we lose the ability to manage our own lives." - Paths to Recovery
Good morning Paul - thanks for your service, your ESH and the daily. I am raising my hand as one who projected the worse case scenario often/always and then supported my position with facts, statistics, and pontificating about how right I was and how bad it was going to be....PFFFFT.... - what a waste of energy, time, emotion and just crazy-making or my insanity resulting from the disease.
My brain still at times 'wants' to go there. What the daily suggests is exactly what has worked for me. I have found that daily program efforts, much like daily medication, helps me to realize my fear, accept the facts, turn it all over to my higher power and move forward not concerning myself with the outcome. There are times I have to do this over and over and over again - my friend's cancer is a perfect example.
What I love about recovery is the frequency and intensity of my fearful moments have become fewer and less. Keeping the focus on me and what I can do to be of service to others has shown me that even when/if I am powerless over the outcome, I can do something each day for me and others that brings me peace.
Sandlot softball tonight - everyone welcome - PM me if you want details sir! I am off to golf in a while, then a meal with my active child and finishing the day with softball tonight! So grateful for this program, otherwise my sadness over not seeing my littlest goblins would 'win' and I'd have a pity party instead! Make it a great day!
__________________
Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
Hello Paul, I really appreciate your share on today's important reading. When I entered program many years ago, I always thought that having courage meant not feeling fear.
Apparently as a young child living with the disease of alcoholism in my home. I had learned how to change my fear into anger, resentment, self-pity and blame. I never did feel fear. Because the instant that feeling surfaced within I had automatically learned how to change it.
Entering program and working the steps, examining my motives I discovered fear and that was terrifying. With all the other feelings, I was able to express them without difficulty however "fear" immobilized me. Thank goodness for sponsors and meetings because I was taught that courage is fear that has said its prayers and that I couldn't have courage unless I had felt fear, and that made sense.
I was also given some great little tools that helped a lot- I understand that fear was simply:" false evidence appearing real" and that Fear also meant ;" Face everything and recover. Today when I feel fear. I no longer converted i into anger, resentment or rn. I acknowledge it and ask HP to give me the courage to face life on life's terms and I walk through the fear and grow.
I Love that quote about building nests in my hair- I know that prior to program I had tons of nests in my hair and it took a great deal of effort to untangle them and so I will not allow them back
