The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I've been kind of morose and defeatist of late and I think gratitude might be the cure so, I'm trying to be on a gratitude binge.
So far so good.
This morning I woke reasonably early and lazed in bed for a good hour writing and daydreaming and being grateful for Sunday. I then suggested to my offspring that we should head out for coffee and a dog-walk before the weather got too wild. (It's now officially wild and we are huddled indoors; every time I look at the window I expect to see Mrs Crazy Lady From Over the Road fly past on a bicycle, cackling at me).
Anyway while it was still calm we headed to the bay and walked along the waterfront with the dog. Daughter was non-verbal as she was quite consumed with taking pictures; I decided that I am quite OK with that; time together doesn't HAVE to mean conversation. So we basically didn't speak; we found a cafe and caffeinated in silence and I decided to take pictures as well because, why not.
I've attached my best efforts; they don't come close to hers but they're OK.
I was grateful for the quiet, the average coffee, the knowledge that we wont get coffee there again, the shared interest and the simple fact of being out among people for no reason other than "because".
We walked a little further after coffee and it started to rain and on the pier there was a man trying unsuccessfully to stand up; I suspect he had been sleeping off his Saturday night until the rain woke him. He was totaled and the weird, unsettling thing about that was, he was similar in build and appearance to Xabf and watching him struggling to get up gave me this sudden weird miserable craving? Like if it HAD been Xabf I would have gone over and sat and giggled with him while he tried to get up, and I would ignored people's stares and whispers as I acted as a crutch and stopped for him to fall over all the way home? (Where he would have slept and the woken in a horrible mean mood later). And somehow this memory of a thousand miserable Sunday mornings gone by triggered a craving?!? A sense of loss? Just weird. Something is still quite wrong inside this heart of mine, but, progress, not perfection huh?
As disturbing as that was I am and was grateful that it was a memory and not a present-moment situation.
We did the grocery shopping on the way home; daughter had her fill of my company and started to get snarky and I decided I was grateful for the fact that I didn't feel any need to engage and simple tuned it out and concentrated on menu-planning.
It's been a good day anyway; plenty to be grateful for and very little to complain about, although I suppose if I'd chosen to view it differently I could turn all of that on it's head quite easily. So I guess I am also grateful for the recent remembering of the importance of being grateful, which is what, in the end, made it a good day. Hooray!
Happy Sunday to all anyway; as mine comes to an end it's just beginning for many of you and I hope you make it a good one too.
-- Edited by MissM on Sunday 9th of October 2016 01:11:43 AM
True what you're saying. It is I who can practice gratitude so that while I acknowledge the misery in my path, I can concentrate on what works for me. Nice telling, MissM and thanks for beach pictures - always welcome. Water! Beach!
"Mrs Crazy Lady from over the road fly past on a bicycle cackling at me" - that's hilarious and really hit home! I live in Kansas and we had a tornado go through just a couple days ago - leveled one house and caused severe damage to a couple others. There were lots of crazy ladies flying through the air on bicycles that day.....and cackling! LOL. Thanks for the Sunday laugh!!!
Thanks Ms. M. for the lovely pictures and for sharing your recovery. I too have found that I can turn any situation around by making a gratitude list. It is great to know we have choices and to use them in a positive fashion.
Thanks for beach pictures as well as I am sitting in snow ! Early winter has arrived here. Enjoying the small moments and focusing on gratitude. It really is all about how we choose to view things isn't it. Thanks for the share.
Yes! I think i need to stick a note on my fridge that says "Make a gratitude list" whenever I'm feeling down. Great photos -- how nice to be by the beach!
You are a great projector MissM and always have been. I read your post and "get it". You are sounding grown up now and isn't that a secure feeling. Thanks for the ESH and have a great day. ((((hugs))))
We are on the edge of Hurricane Matthew right now, it will not really affect us except for the barometric pressure rain and dark gloomy skies. I have thick coarse hair that frizzes in this weather. This morning I woke up late, had to get ready a little rushed for church. I looked in the mirror and the barometric pressure really did a number on my hair. My thought processes have been a little annoyed at everything lately, so I kind of did the same thing...I was grateful for the little extra sleep as obviously I must have needed it and options to do with me hair. Lol
Just weird. Something is still quite wrong inside this heart of mine, but, progress, not perfection huh?
