The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Hi I'm new to this,my husband is an alcoholic. I am trying to cope and would appreciate any advise of how to get threw each day!! He is in therapy,has a sponsor and is trying to work threw this. I have trouble with his lies and the fact I can't control his disease. I think I need advice of how to make changes and set boundaries.
Welcome Joba I am pleased that you reached out Alanon is just the place to provide you with thetools you need to live with this disease in a healthy fashion.
As you no doubt know alcoholism is a chronic, progressive disease over which we are powerless. Living with and coping with this disease causes many to develop negative coping tools in order to survive.
Alanon holds face to face meetings in most comunities and it is here you will be able to break the isolation caused by living with the disease. The hot line number can be found in the white pages and it is with the support of this great fellowship, I was able to rebuild my self esteem and learn new tools to live by
Joba, you are wise to think about just getting through each day, because that's all we have. I do understand your feelings and have felt the same way. I will just share a couple of quick things we learn in Alanon, until you can get to a meeting and lrarn more. The 3 C's- You didn't cause, cannot control, and cannot cure someone else's drinking. Take care of yourself, take time to do something each day that is joyful for you ... do a craft, walk with friends, pamper yourself, etc. Just realize that you deserve your own recovery.
Aloha Joba and welcome to the fellowship of MIP/Al-Anon I'm glad you found the front door, came in and introduced yourself...we always have room for more family to come and check in. Only one of the tools we have is the Board you checked in on where you can read the past experience of MIP and learn that you are not alone and that there are so many experiences that you can read on where we reach out for help to get it and give it. I hope you keep coming back cause Al-Anon works when you work it and you don't have to cave into the disease and its insanity. ((((hugs))))
Hey there Joba - I too send my welcomes out to you. Glad you found us and glad that you joined right in. I needed support and help detaching from my qualifier and setting up healthy boundaries, so I went to local Al-Anon meetings, got a sponsor and worked on me. This disease is considered a family disease as it reaches well beyond the drinker to almost everyone who lives with or loves them. We need our own program to help us restore our thinking and self-care.
Please keep coming back - you are not alone and there is help and hope in recovery!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
