The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Last night my husband expressed how very hard it is for him, most of his friends are drinking buddies. I could feel his agony of the thought of losing this set of friends. It's as if it's everything to him, he has a very poor family (origin) support system. I know that what worries him most is losing his best friend, also into drinking. His tone is not that of sadness but it seems he wants to put that on me that he will be losing his friends. I just said do what you think is best for you and left him alone. I would like to be there for him but I cannot because he has recently been very hostile towards me and I don't want to be anywhere near him as much as possible.
It's so true that his behavior now that he's trying to stop from drinking is far more worse than when he was drinking. And many of us have expressed that "how I wish my husband will just stop drinking". But it doesn't end there, reminds me of those home TV shopping cliche: "but wait there's more"
Sometimes I feel some resentment in my situation of having no f2f meetings, no sponsor, no one to call and talk to, no one to be physically with or go out with whom I can share my feelings. I know this is not a good feeling, I just need to say it for whatever its worth.
At least I have MIP where I can write and pour out... but sometimes I want to shutdown already, not to read and not to post anymore, I just want to be alone... Thanks to all of you here, for everything (((((Hugs))))
My AH and I haven't spoke much in the last 3 months and we still live in the same house. I understand your loneliness and not having much support. I did find a nar-anon f2f meeting close enough to go to once a week but it's a very small group with no one far enough along in the program to be a sponsor so I'm working the steps (against all advice) by myself.
The main thing is I know I need help and I have do something to fix me because I cannot fix anyone else, trust me I've tried! So even if it's only here to vent, or grow, or cry, or help someone else you can relate to... Keep coming back. You are loved and you are certainly not alone!
