The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Hello all, had been enjoying a pleasant, calm Sunday morning with AH. Getting along well, me in and enjoying Al-anon mode. Then in an instant, a mood swing happens in him.
Quite a surprise, useful wake up call for me to witness just how unwell he is.
Turned from pleasant to dark faced and snarling in a second.
I haven't seen it so clearly before. I think the cloudy filters in front of my eyes have dropped.
I also see it is about him. Something going on in him. I feel no blame or guilt. Which is great.
I have removed myself from the room.
AH talks of us going on holiday together, things like this remind me why that is a really bad idea. I wouldn't be able to remove myself, we would be stuck together for far too long.
Great awareness Please keep using your tools and recite the serenity prayer . I refused to sacrifice my serenity for anyone or anything. You are on your way.
(((Calm Lady))) - so happy for you that you were able to stay in Al-Anon mode and see it for what it is/was - him, not you!!! These are the moments for me that I can forget all I know/have learned and snap back.....good on you you choose peace, just for today!
With great fear and my suitcase full of Al-Anon tools, my AH and I road-tripped to AZ from KS this past May. My parents are out there and I asked him if he wanted to go with me (I go each year, twice if possible, once for sure). I was surprised and floored that he said Yes. I usually fly but we drove so he could nurture, protect and care for his golf clubs!
18 hours in the car there and 18 hours back - long drive. 2 weeks there hanging with my parents - we had our own condo. It went way better than I ever thought it could/would only because of this program. There were hiccups and a few issues, but the program tools gave me what I needed to just accept and enjoy. It's certainly not for everyone but my parents are 82 and I needed to know if I could make the drive in case of emergency. I know now that I can if I have to. My AH got to golf some amazing courses and we had many good times/meals with my parents.
So grateful that HP led me to ask and led me to accept the outcome. May the rest of your day continue in peace as it started!!
(((Hugs)))
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
