The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
The C2C reading for September 11 (a difficult day for me) speaks about working the Fourth Step and making a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.
The reading suggests that many times while we are working the Fourth Step, we will uncover hidden destructive attitudes that we did not realize were there like: perfectionism- always thinking that we are right that whatever we're doing is not good enough . We must accept these awarenesss because it is important that we see what goes in on inside us that may cause us to react in different ways.
Today's reminder suggests that Step Four offers us a chance to find some balance. It helps us to identify the things we have been telling ourselves and to learn whether or not these things are true. We must also check our assumptions and her accomplishments because they are also reality.
The quote is from the Dilemma of the Alcoholic Marriage; "let me realize that self-doubt and self hate are defects of character that hinder my growth."
This is a great page to read and re read. Step 4 is not about finding out how terrible we are . Instead, found that it is a process by which we look within to see what we have been doing to hurt ourselves.. Once we uncover these destructive negative voices, we can easily invalidate them with the assets we uncover in the same step.
Thank you for posting this. I am very afraid of Step 4. I have alot of work still on the first three steps and need a sponsor but it lingers in the back of my mind.
Thank you Betty for the daily and your service. I always love your ESH.....it carries special messages to my heart! Today is a sad day for me too - I can not believe it's been 15 years ago...9/11 rocked my faith for a while and was just such a sad, still, shocking event/day.
I love all the steps and this program as it gives me the best possible guideline to be the best version of me. My first exposure to the steps had me fearful of the 4th but with a great sponsor I was able to view it as a growth step, a necessary step and a freeing step. Learning about me, my passions, my fears, my patterns and my strengths/defects helps me be, do, react and act differently. I've learned that so, so often, I am afraid of what I think may be vs. what reality is. I've grown enough to pause often to check my thinking and emotions and ask God to give me the wisdom to know the difference between what is real and mine and what is projection and not mine.
For me, the steps have set me free to trust God and his nudges forward. Grateful for MIP, Al-Anon, our program and you!!
Off to play more ball in a short while then again tonight....grateful that tomorrow is a 'day of rest' for me - feeling closer to my age today!! (((Hugs))) Betty!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
