The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I need to take note when times are good. Work is good. I like my job, coworkers, my bosses and my employees. I just got a killer job evaluation and we kicked butt through a DCF audit this week. In 6 months, bosses have gone from saying, ouy of the 3 sites the company has, that we were the "short bus" center to now the "best of all 3" and the "Marquis."
Chuck and I are doing well. His new company is exploding exponentially in business volume and profit. He does work an awful lot, but I understand. This is his dream and legacy...to build a multimillion dollar business. It does force me to be less needy and focus on my own goals and independence. He is going away to palm springs next week for like 6 days. In the past, I would have been throwing tantrums and whining and crying over being left alone due to being so needy and codependent. It will be fine. I can go to more meetings. Watch stupid horror movies that he doesn't like and chill with all 7 pets.
Health wise - I went to the doctor in May of this year and was disgusted that in the 8 months or so prior, while at a job I didn't like with a long commute, I had gained so much weight from not working out and emotional eating that I tipped the scale at 211. I was like "Oh Hell NO!" "This is unacceptable." I started working out daily and have now taken up running again. Current weight: 179. I fit in all my skinny clothes again and it feels good.
Most importantly, I am happy that by learning to care for myself in AA and in alanon, I learned to let go of things not good for me and beneath my standards. I learned to get back on track when off track. I learned to not settle and to strive instead of complain. Good stuff comes into my life when i let go of toxic crap and do the next right thing. Granted, I am slow to recognize and let go of toxic crap like most of us alanoners, but VASTLY improved.
I am 44 now and thus far, these (my 40s) have been the best years of my life.
Hurray for you Pinkchip - way to go! Thanks for sharing how it works - I so need to see/hear about success in others! I will say that my 40s were very rocky to start better to end but if you think that's a great decade - just wait for the 50(s).....the best is yet to come!
For me, there was something 'real' about 50. I often say that my give-a-sh.. meter pegged out at 50. I was truly mature enough to really set aside what others thought of me, said to me and felt about me. Not sure what magical thing happened, but I had a huge burst of esteem & confidence arrive at 50....I honestly think it has everything to do with living that long. When I was active in my addiction, I never, ever expected to make it to 50 but can't say for sure.
I am more active, more social and more free than in my 40(s) which were also a huge growth decade for me. It just gets better and better from here on out or so I believe!
Safe travels to Chuck and happy horror flick marathon to you! Life is good!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
WooHoo, Pinkchip! Such a great, positive post! Love it! Savor all your successes and forward movement.
The 40s is a nice decade to be in, but IAH is right - once you hit 50, the mindset changes and the blossoming really begins; others opinions don't matter as much anymore.
You are doing so well! Congratulations to where you are right now.
I read your post last night and then woke up this morning with you on my mind, in a very good way Mark! Thank you for being here - you are an awesome inspiration. Great to know that these are the best years - with many more to follow!
Was speaking with a fellow after this mornings "At the Bay" meeting and the conversation was about successes which have been had in recovery; clinical and non and I noticed how my spirits always grow when listening to the successes. Thanks Mark your verification is heart warming. (((hugs)))
Awesome Mark!!! So glad to hear this. I am 46 and feel that my 40s were a huge place of growth and opportunity for me. I'm still healthy and still kicking, so life must be good as it is for you! Good luck to Chuck and his expanding business goals. With you supporting him, he's going to do great!
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Never grow a wishbone where your backbone ought to be!
