Ah, yes. I think you are correct. Thank you. I needed someone who was detached to give me some feedback. 

 

 

I learned that I could and would make the decision which I thought proper and then was willing to accept the consequences of that decision.  I was almost always ready to accept what came next while getting involved on my part was to create a response.  I once attended a physical therapy session form alcoholic/addict wife  I was a therapist in an alcohol and substance abuse program at the time and when I accompanied her to the treatment room I told the doctors "what ever you do ...do not wipe her down with alcohol after the session".  They shined me on until they had to come into the waiting room to get me and telling me to come and that she wanted me to assist and that I was the only one she needed.  I went into the therapy room and found my wife in full physical and neurological trauma.  Alcohol is a powerful chemical with a high rate of absorption.  It doesn't have to be drank by the alcoholic it can be absorbed and that is what happened.  I stayed until I brought her out of the crises and then they had us leave by the back door of the clinic.  Do what you know best with the aid of others who also know or not. 

Learn as much as you can about alcohol and  how it works and after you get away from being stunned be educated....Keep coming back.  As you can guess I'm not much for being shy when as crises happens (((((hugs)))))   

As someone in the Medical field Pinkchip is correct, they will not be able to discuss anything with you. With the recent changes made to the drug schedule of Norco Doctors are being closely monitored by different state/federal government agencies about the quantity of prescriptions that they write. All of the new scrutiny have a lot of Doctors nervous about writing prescriptions and slightly paranoid because historically there has been more blame placed on Pharmacies if something goes wrong for the patient.

Now that being said that does not prevent them from listening to you. There is nothing in HIPAA law that prevents them from hearing your concerns or reading about them in a letter. You might find them receptive to the information and you might get hung up on.

You are correct that you cannot control his usage and sadly Norco is just as easily available on the streets as it is from a Doctor. You would be SHOCKED at the amounts of narcotics that patients come in with prescriptions for and if its a legal, valid prescription there is very little that Pharmacies can do to prevent them from being filled.

You used the phrase "intentionally hurt himself" that is an entirely different animal that most law enforcement and Doctors will take very seriously. Most police departments will happily do a welfare check but that doesn't mean they will be able to actually do anything if the person tells them they are fine and to get lost.

Ultimately you need to decide how far you feel you have to go for your own sanity. For me personally I generally give it one good attempt and then deal with things as they come. Recently I went around my father and spoke to his Doctor about some very serious issues he was having that I knew the Doctor was not being told about. I would not have been able to sleep at night if something had happened and I had not at least tried to relay the information that I had. Now my Father is not an alcoholic BUT he was not being honest with his Doctor and was putting his life in jeopardy. I refused to listen to him complain that his doctor (a locally known and well respected specialst) was a quack who did not know what he was doing. I refused to cosign my Father's BS and refused to hear him play the victim. I said my piece to my Father, who still failed to be honest. So instead of getting sucked in to my Father's issues, like my Mother is, I sent his Doctor an email. I was not in the room at his next appointment but I am told that it went very differently, his diagnosis was changed and he is now on medication that has greatly improved his quality of life. I never expected a Thank you and I never said "I told you so". I did not do it for him, I did it for me and my sanity. I received an email back from the Doctor saying simply "Thank you for the update your message has been received" and as far as I know my Father has no idea that I intervened.

You have to set your own boundaries and that can be incredibly challenging. For me that means one honest try on each reasonable path I see, like with my father. For others that might mean 2 or 3 tries, that does not make their way or my way wrong.

I was told once to not see consequences as a bad thing. Being forced to take responsibility for your actions and to deal with ramifications are often the biggest opportunities for growth that Adults face. Sometimes consequences happen naturally and other times (like with my father) you are nudged towards them.

The decision is not an easy one and I am sorry that you find yourself in this position (((hugs)))

Just wanted to weigh in on the wellness check. You can call the police to request this if you feel that he is in danger of hurting himself. I had to do this with my AH when he was at his bottom and staying in a motel. They went over to check on him and took him in for observation at a local hospital. In the end they determined he wasn't suicidal but for peace of mind I was so glad that I made that call. You don't want to be in the position of "what if". I really didn't think he would but alcohol really clouds people's judgments and you never know if they will do something crazy while under the influence. I hope you can find a face to face meeting where you live.

Welcome to MIP Girl Friday! Glad you found us and joined right in!

Keep coming back and glad to have you be a part of our journey!!