The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I feel like I am drowning right now. Between pressures at work, guilt feelings for not enough time spent with extended family and dealing with the insanity of active alcoholism in my home, I am ready to run for the hills and hide out. I have a friend who is on holiday in Europe and told me I could stay at their place anytime while they are gone, and I think I may take the offer for a few days. It is a lovely home with a pool. I really feel like I could use some decompress time. But, the feelings of guilt for not being home after work and not being able to "handle" life on life's terms is weakening my resolve to take some time away from home. I don't want it to look like punishment, I just want to only have to deal with myself and my own crazy for a couple of days.
Thanks for letting me talk this out...I guess I want to give myself permission to take a time out from life at home.
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Bethany
"Folks are usually about as happy as they make their minds up to be." Abe Lincoln
Bethany, I have done exactly this. I felt the very same way -- drowning. Getting away for a few days was very helpful. It did not solve all the problems, but it allowed me to come up for air. I hope you have a wonderful respite.
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Oh B66 do take time out for yourself, none of us are helpful to anyone unless we can energize, relax and get a better perspective on whats going on around us. Taking care of yourself is always a priority....a pool sounds great. linsc
Go for it, if its what you want and its what you feel will be good for you then thats the right thing to do for everyone. Staying for others is kind of enabling anyway, so I say go for it and enjoy. It will likely do you and everyone around you the world of good. Guilt has no positive consequences it is a useless feeling that can be dangerous for you and others, especially alcoholics.x
I remember the first time I took a 'break' I was so certain all he!! would break loose and chaos would draw me back and ......
It was actually a great break, and while there was some issues, they were able to manage without me! It gave me the freedom to know that God is watching out for all of us - even those who chose the path less traveled.
I agree - breaks are so helpful for a recentering of my soul!!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
Who says that taking a break when needed and offered *isn't* living life on life's terms? You didn't manipulate your way into it, you didn't yell and scream for it, so to me that is a free gift from HP!
Sounds like you already know that you need to decompress and the fates have given you a wonderful opportunity to do just that. When I felt guilty about taking a break from my husband I made it clear that the break was for me and not about him. I reasoned that I would come home a nicer person and that was a winner for everyone. Even when my mother had cancer I reached a point where I had to take a short break - it helped me to carry on being the person that I wanted to be. It isn't punishment, it is good sense! I'm picturing you by that pool - sounds lovely. Enjoy!!
a break is always a good thing. when i was hospice caring my dad alone 24/7 for a month.. i nearly lost it. One nite,some visitors came to see my dad, so i slipped out to a local carnival for some target practice and a ride on a scary ride. that cleared my head. enjoy.
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