The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I arrived 15 min early and no one was there. I went around the block a few times thinking it was a sign that this just wasn't meant to be when finally I saw two cars in the lot. Told myself that I should do one thing today that terrifies me, parked the car and went in. Apparently the look on my face said it all because the two ladies there got up out of their chairs and hugged me and I began to cry (I am not a crier). They were very kind, and the three of us had our little meeting and the topic was basically detaching. I was given some literature that has been really helpful and told to come back for at least five more meetings. It felt good facing my fears and going in and I will go again next week because it was great to talk with people who didn't make horrified faces when I told my story.
He continues drinking non-stop, has missed several days of work, and is doing everything he can to push my buttons. I lost myself a bit but when I sat down and read my Al-anon stuff, it was like an ah ha moment. I fell into an old trap, I was so worried with his behavior that I forgot to see my part in it. I admit that my tiny digs weren't as kindly intended as I'd convinced myself they had been, and I repeatedly allowed myself to be baited into trying to explain his twisted facts and accusations. So I will have tonight to try to remember not to argue with an alcoholic, to curb my digs, and to leave the room. Gonna to try and remind myself this is not about him, it's about me.
(((Groo)) I am so pleased that you found the courage to attend a face to face meeting. Finding the support and understanding in these rooms really helped me to keep coming back and work the program. If it gets difficult tonight pick up the literature and read a little Keep coming back here as well-- You have taken a huge step. Good job.
Amazing. Awesome awareness already. You are very brave. The hardest thing was for me to just walk into my first meeting and I was a crying mess too. That is painful but normal after living in pain for so long. Good job!
-- Edited by pinkchip on Wednesday 3rd of August 2016 06:47:01 PM
Groo, that is fantastic! I can relate, I was quite apprehensive before my first meeting, and yet still a bit when I am attending a new group or a new town. Some meetings have been more helpful than others, but I can say that I have never come away from a meeting and regretted going. I always find a new perspective or realization about myself and the power that I have over the things in my life.
Thank you for sharing your victory with us!
__________________
Paul
"...when we try to control others, we lose the ability to manage our own lives." - Paths to Recovery
Way to go Groo - good job stepping beyond your fear! It sounds like you absorb quickly and already found some tools you can try to see how they work. I am so glad that went and so glad that you came back and shared with us!
I went to my home group today and we had a new member too. The program works if we work it and it's all about progress, not perfection!
Keep coming back!
__________________
Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
I didn't learn that fast...it took me a long while to come to your understanding Groo and then it is what it is and I have no regrets. Please keep coming back cause this does work when you work it. ((hugs))
