Today's C2C talks about saying yes when we mean no, and how many of us, at the outset, have the wish to be able to speak up for our true desires but lack the courage to do so and so instead we agree to things we do not want and end up resentful and tired of our own relentless people pleasing.

The reading suggests that this courage can be grated by a higher power, if we are willing to accept that not everyone will enjoy our new boundaries and willing to learn to say No when we mean No.

The reading reminds us to consider whether or not we say what we mean and mean what we say. If not, why not?

"There is a price that is too great to pay for peace....One cannot pay the price of self respect" (Woodrow Wilson)

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Learning to speak up for myself was at first almost impossible. I would shake and worry over it for days in advance if I was anticipating a situation where I might be called on to defend my new boundaries and say no (or yes as the case may be). Over time it has gotten easier and now I generally let the moment decide how I want to respond to things rather than all of that awful anticipation anxiety! But it certainly required a lot of practice to start with, and a lot of finding courage that I didn't know I had. 

I have to admit that for me, once I got the hang of it, this is one of the al-anon lesson's that I've embraced and enjoyed- (much like learning to do nice things for myself lol). I find speaking up for myself and saying no when I mean no really quite satisfying now; very different to my old way of doing things which was to have an anxious fit, agree to things I didn't want to agree to and then stomp around being angry and resentful!