The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I am just not comfortable talking with people face to face. Which is why I have never been to a F2F meeting. I don't like talking on the phone either.
"Talking" electronically (by email, text, in an online meeting room, or like on this message board works so well for me.
I'm gueessing others feel that way as so many come here too?
I came here in the beginning as I was very insane and insecure resulting from the insanity of this disease. I had my life compartmentalized and remained social but I limited my sharing. Example - softball friends - talk about softball stuff and job. Job people - talk about the business, the job and limited pleasantries. Friends/family - very selective but more open about what was going on - but guarded as I didn't want to be advised or judged....beyond that, I was isolated often and felt like a chameleon. It become uncomfortable and depressing over time for me.
I believe we are created to be social beings. If not, we would not have neighbors and other people in our world. I believe we can choose who/when/how long/why we socialize, but believe we need to experience all to get the most exposure for growth. My sponsor made it perfectly clear that while I had found this marvelous wonderful online family, I was not allowed to let it replace the experience of F2F meetings. I went to one group and was not comfortable and balked at trying again - she gently suggested I do so. I finally did and found a lovely group where I can be me - happy often, sad at times, confused at others and scattered always.
So I keep coming back because I want to support others who want to find serenity and joy. Taking the baby steps of going to meetings gave me back my courage to - go to the gym, go for a walk, go to meetings, play more softball, start playing golf, take meetings to those who can't go (physically unable), etc. I love being out and about and enjoy my social circle as the program has showed me how to pick and be a good friend/member of the fellowship.
For me, what I thought I liked and new about me has changed often in my life and even more so in recovery. Trying new things for me is now fun and exciting since I no longer concern myself with what others think of me and realize I am not expected to be perfect. Hope this helps you venture out and go to a F2F meeting - you truly don't know what you are missing until you find that home group that speaks to you and where you feel a part of.
__________________
Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
I love people even though not social so i am opposite
Than you. I love interacting and having fun with people
I know. I live in an area that is small and friendly and
People actually smile at you even if they dont know you.
I love MIP to help me get thru my day and to keep my sanity
But i still need my alanon home group and any of my other
Live Support.
I can express myself better typing it out, thinking,stopping
And reflecting. Many times i just delete a post after typing
it Out Its sort of like journaling my thoughts on that subject.
The more i work on my emotional sobriety the more my
Emotions and feelings surface. It is truly the peeling of the
onion and It takes time. My spiritual self is much stonger
Than my emotional self.
I dont know you so dont know where you are at, i am a
Very slow learner and grower. My inner codie is stubborn
And needed all the love and support it can get. It needs
Retraining and reparenting on every level.
To me so much is just getting emotionally and spiritually
mature in all Aspects of my life. Living life on lifes terms
Is my goal.
