The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Yay Cathy - that sounds exciting!! I too will pray for a great outcome, buyers and peace - selling a home and moving is one of those 'big life stressers' so be gentle with you!!!
(((Hugs)))
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
Hugs Cathy.
You know this is the worst part of the ripping off of the bandaid. It's going to be OK, and then it's going to be alright, and then, it's going to be good. And after that, it'll get better.
Sending you positive vibes and strength.
PS I guess remember he's allowed to be unhappy and angry. That doesn't mean he's allowed to take it out on you, but, he's allowed to not like it. What can you do for you today?
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If I had a world of my own, everything would be nonsense. Nothing would be what it is, because everything would be what it isn't. And contrary wise, what is, it wouldn't be. And what it wouldn't be, it would. You see? (Lewis Caroll)
Your both right..He can be mad and upset but not take it out on me and yes I just have to detach and quit feeling so bad. It will all be over soon I pray.
Cathy when divorce /end is declared the gloves
Are off and it can get nasty real quick. Some
Can stay in the same house many can not.
If there is abuse it will not get better only
Worse. Can one of you find another place
Until it sells. My ex moved in with his mother
until the divorce.
I no more could have lived with my ex he
Was being nasty enough because he had a
GF and wanted me out him in, i stood my
Ground and had my own lawyer. He filed
Against me.
It was an intense time, i never was fearful
Of physical harm only his tongue. I know
You are not married maybe you should see
A lawyer to have all your ducks in a row.
Stay safe i hope to never travel down that
Soul sucking road ever again.
He has no where to go, no family, no friends...nothing. I don't know how he is going to live after all is said and done because he retired way to early and doesn't have much money coming in.....just SSI.
I really support him mostly and his money just pays for the house payment....so I really can't leave either and support two households.
I just hope to stay clear of him.....going to work and staying in my room most of the time.
I just pray it's over soon.
PS: If he does get violent I did get a Order of Protection a month ago...just never executed it. He would have to leave so God forbid I would have to use it against him.
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Lord, put your arm around my shoulder and your hand over my mouth
Speak only when you feel that your words are better than your silence.
My ex came in and out of the house
to let the cat in when he arrived in
The am before going off to work. I
never felt Threatened or any other
time just With His directed anger.
We did not see each other up close
We wrote in a notebook and talked
Thru lawyers for the legal issues.
We kept it civil and tried to keep it
mature.
He has no where to go, no family, no friends...nothing. I don't know how he is going to live after all is said and done because he retired way to early and doesn't have much money coming in.....just SSI.
Honey, that is not your concern.......sounds cold but you have to put yourself first.
Thank you all....the house is officially on the market so I pray it just sells and we can go our separate ways. We haven't been talk all week but last night he did break down and asked if we could at least live in peace here together in the short term. I agreed so lets hope it lasts.
It's the weekend and all is quite. He sleeps around 14-16 hours a day so I won't have to deal with anything too much. Sleeps all day and is up all night.
(( hugs ))
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Lord, put your arm around my shoulder and your hand over my mouth
Speak only when you feel that your words are better than your silence.
Ha ha, not sure what he means? "Let's be peaceful" He's the one being nasty! Glad he is sleeping....
I recognise that discomfort around my son too. It's like he's gonna go out and get self-destructive again, so I fear getting close. I'm sure this is not a good way to be, and have tried to let it go and let God, but it's not easy. Hang in there Cathy, linsc