The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
My husband had been working his program and doing better, but it's been going the other way for a while, and has become unmanageable. After having consulted with addiction professionals, today I told him he cannot return to live in our home until he has completed 90 documented meetings in 90 days. He took it ok I guess. His head isn't really in program mode though. I know 90 days for a chance at decades is small, but I'm feeling daunted by being on my own again and a single mom ( we have a blended family, both have kids from before but not together). I will start working my own program, yet am looking for any suggestions and guidance anyone can offer at this point. Thank you
Welcome to MIP crochet mama - glad you found us and so glad that you shared. I believe my best suggestion has been 'considered' - start working your own program by attending local Al-Anon meetings. It's frightening at first, but soon you will have local support that understand what you live with and can help you understand the disease and how to best manage your actions, reactions.....we do this by sharing our experience, strength and hope with the common goal of finding serenity and joy - no matter what the qualifier is/is not doing.
Please keep coming back - you are not alone and there is hope through recovery and healing!!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
Welcome I agree with IAH alanon face to face meetings will provide you with the support that you will need in order to cope with this dreadful disease. Pick up some literature and keep coming back.
Alcoholism is a chronic disease that can be arrested but never cured. We are powerless over this disease so the best we can do is learn how to care for ourselves as we develop new tools to thrive.
Welcome crochet glad you are willing to start your own
Recovery and attend ftf meetings. It is highly recommended
when One is in AA that the other starts alanon so both are
On the same page and working on getting healthy.
His recovery is seperate from yours, you learn how To detach
with love, set boundaries, stay on your side Of the street and
stay in your own hula hoop. We work the same 12 steps.
His problems go to his sponsor not you, his stuff is His stuff
not yours to carry for him. How to live life sober and face life
Sober, that he learns at AA meetings and with his sponsor
Help and loving guidance.
If you have to demand or "make" him do his own program, unlikely it will work. Sad but true. If he is not already inspired to eat, breath, and crap recovery /AA stuff just to have his life back and to be free of the horrors of addiction, he is off to a bad start. Only people that want to get sober more than anything actually follow up and do it. What will you do if he never "gets" this and wants it bad enough for himself? That is your task to focus on in your program.
