The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Today's C2C speaks about how difficult it is to face up to our own imperfections, and how, when we have done wrong, it is so much easier to pretend it never happened or to justify the action. But the price we pay for avoiding our own mistakes is guilt.
The reading suggests that the 10th step- continuing to take inventory and promptly admitting when we are wrong, frees us from dragging around the heavy burden of guilt.
The reading suggests that it is much easier to love ourselves if we accept ourselves with our strengths AND failings and reminds us that we ought face our truths, admit our wrongs and accept ourselves as we are.
"I care about truth, not for truth's sake but for my own". (Samuel Butler).
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What strikes me about this reading is the fact that I used to say about others, "I don't care what he/she did, I just wish he'she would be HONEST about it". I could, seemingly, forgive any failing from another person, other than denial or dishonesty. Yet I couldn't afford myself the same; in my mind, my failings were so great that I had to deny them or sugar coat them to be able to live with myself. What an experience it has been to "do to myself as I would do unto others" and allow myself a safe place to admit my wrongs and make sense and right of them. What a wonderful gift to give myself.
Thanks for taking the time to reflect on tis important reading,Ms.M. I love the fact that this Step, done each day immediately helps me to let go of the guilt and shame that I once carried around for years due to my my negative attitudes and actions.
I believe that by working all the Steps, before this one, helped me to see that I was an "imperfect human", like everyone else . I was then able to gratefully join the human race.
Step 10 follows through with this idea and allows me to clear up the mistakes I make in an ongoing fashion. Great Step .
I love this step. It gives me freedom to remember that I'm human. Isn't that nice? We don't have to be perfect all of the time. Just as you said, why do we allow others to be imperfect, but not ourselves.
