3.5 years ago we had a family tragedy and my husband began binge-drinking, for days at a time. To say it was devastating is an understatement. I felt so ashamed and so alone. In my public life, I'm a strong, independent career woman in a male-dominated field. I was so afraid that if anyone knew, their opinions of both of us would be destroyed. A year and a half ago, I'd had all I could take and planned to divorce him. His drinking was also causing problems at work. He agreed to go inpatient and spent about 35 days in rehab. When he came out, he did really well for a while. We attended counseling, separately. Unfortunately, about 3 months after he got out of rehab, his father passed away. He began drinking nightly, something he had done before the binge drinking began. After several months of back and forth, he agreed to drinking a few nights a week. Last October was his first time binge-drinking after coming out of rehab. He did it twice, got very angry at our counselor after a confrontation, and refused to continue counseling. Since this January, he has binged 4 times and is currently in a 3 day binge. Each time, he promises it will never happen again and I tell him if it does, I will leave him. I love him and do not want to leave him. I haven't told anyone what's happening. I feel even more alone and ashamed than before, because I feel like everyone will see how stupid and weak I am for staying.