The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
The C2C reading for April 17 speaks about the difficulty in making decisions because we worry about making others happy, and try to make sure everyone will be happy with the decision. We think there is a perfect way to do things and it is our responsibility to find it .
This reading focuses on the Traditions and how we apply them to our personal lives . It points out that we can find happiness and even contentment regardless of anyone else's actions.
Al-Anon points out that if we develop a simple policy, such as the First Tradition and consider that in all situations the "common welfare " should come first, we can apply this to our personal life as well as a life in the Al-Anon groups.
If the group plans and format are designed to meet the greatest number of people-- I can usually support the idea. I do not ignore my own needs and feelings, I express them and respect the fact that others have needs too. I must respect these choices and this may not bring me immediate happiness, but ultimately, we will discover the benefits. ". Personal progress for the greatest number depends upon unity."
I can feel secure in my opinions if I keep the groups best interest at heart.
The quote is from the 12 Steps and 12 Traditions; "unity presents not only the necessary climate for the growth of Al-Anon as a whole, but also the atmosphere in which each member within the group may acquire peace of mind."
I like how alanon points out that it is my responsibility to voice my opinion , listen with an open mind to others and then to consider the unity of the "Whole "and vote-- not my pet project-- but what I believe is for the best interest of alanon as a whole .
I know when I first heard this Tradition read at meetings I felt OH NO just like my family- We all have to walk lock step and be clones of the leader. I soon found out this was not so. There are no leaders, we are a fellowship of equals and we talk things over, we reason things out, and each member is responsible to present their idea on a situation and only then do we vote. The most important difference here than in my family is that people listen respectfully to each other and there is no yelling or screaming or insulting to get our way HP is in control How grown up is that?
Thank you Betty for today's reading, your service and ESH! This is a perfect reading for me today as we are all tired and on our last day of our family wedding experience. It's gone very well - but we all know....family can be difficult! Doing what makes sense for the group and not loosing myself in the mix has been a huge challenge in the past. I can say that this trip has gone much better and smoother since I am working on staying in the present! One moment at a time, I can get through anything.
As I am typing this, my mother is talking non-stop 'at me' about last night, and of course this is the 3rd time this morning, as if I wasn't there....I just keep smiling and saying, "Ummmm" - LOL.
I am grateful that I have gained some patience and peace through Al-Anon or I'd be pulling my hair out. She's lovely, just aging and always nosy rosy!!
Flying home today - will be grateful to see my fur-baby, my pillows, my bed, my home - yay!!! (((Hugs))) to all!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
