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This has been a tough week in terms of emotionally for me, I think there is a lot going on .. lol. Easter, birthdays trying to complete a few things knowing that the attorney still won't be done until May.
Last night my boy was the social kid, he did a dance with his "new" girlfriend .. LOL. I did tell him he getter get out and dance the last time he stood on the wall and the old girlfriend dumped him .. LOL .. I know thanks mom. He then got to go to a really neat Magic event (it's a card game), it started at 1230AM and went until 4AM .. LOL. I did not stay I can only keep those hours every few weeks .. not long enough. So I dropped him off and he had a blast I pick him up and he wants to know where next .. LOL .. umm little man .. it is 4AM .. the only thing happening out here is trouble. LOL .. I can do that anytime of the day 4AM my brain and body was screaming sleep. I did power nap. That event was the last of his birthday from me. He kept my hours this weekend and OMGOSH I paid for it .. LOL.
My daughter's birthday is Sunday. Today she's taking some AP tests today, that are considered "practice" however she gets extra credit. These tests are important because she gets dual credit for her classes. The goal is to be 1/2 way through her freshman year of college so it's not so stressful. I'm so stinking proud of that kid. I try to tell her that not daily just remind her I happen to think she's neat even though she's my kid I would want to know her even if I wasn't her mom. She's truly a neat kid. Child did NOT want to go and I literally was dragging her out the door by her hair .. OK .. not that bad .. however I think I had an ear in my hand. LOL!
SO apparently we are having another family date with her boyfriend .. LOL .. botanical gardens here we come. I think we will go somewhere else too. I just haven't decided she's been talking about some museums too. I teased we are going to have to have a 3x date (her, me and her brother .. LOL), I figure whomever can survive that needs to stay within the family circle (for those who remember Meet the Parents .. LOL). This is what she wanted to do for her boyfriend this means it's girl day in terms of beauty which will be fun.
My mother emailed me last night out of the blue and I am just not sure how to feel about it. I don't think she's expecting a response it was more I'm leaving on vacation for a month here's a number in case of emergency kind of thing. Honestly .. I am conflicted because the little girl in me wants to say WTF, go away you have done enough damage for 3 lifetimes and then the adult in me knows I should just leave it alone since I honestly have nothing nice to say. I'm opting to remain silent.
I spoke to my sponsor the other day .. I miss her like crazy .. LOL. We laughed and laughed it was so good to hear how strong she is, .. she's doing gentle yoga and I'm so glad .. she loves it and in 3 weeks it has made a new woman out of her. If you could please continue to keep her in your prayers she's doing so well. I was able to talk through a few things and as she keeps reminding me .. things just are not finished and when they are I will move on. I know that's true.
This whole single thing is a lot of fun .. lol. I have to ask though .. I own a pair of little girl (and yes my feet are that small) red boots .. I love these things .. LOL .. every time I wear them someone has something to say. They are very little girl like in terms of bright red and white stitching I haven't owned a pair of boots like that forever! My daughter teases me and this is why she's my favorite daughter .. LOL. If you are wearing the red boots we aren't going out .. nothing good comes from those boots .. well .. for you maybe. LOL! It looks like I'm going as a wingman on a double "date" dancing in a couple of weeks and I'm totally looking forward to it. I haven't been dancing in forever! As long as said guy is a good dancer it will be a good time. I would love to have a dance partner and I guess he likes to do that kind of thing.
Anyway, that's the normalcy of my life .. LOL.
Hugs S :)
__________________
Faith minus vulnerability and mystery equals extremism. If you've got all the answers, then don't call what you do "faith". - Brene Brown
"Whatever truth you own doesn't own you" - Gary John Bishop
(((S))) - you sound good and I am always so happy to hear how well the kids are doing!! Keep on keeping on - it looks so good on you!!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
Well aren't we a couple of proud mamas with clever girls lol.
I love hearing about your new life; you do one thing that I don't do and make time for fun and that's something I really must do, so thanks for the reminder
(((serenity)))
__________________
If I had a world of my own, everything would be nonsense. Nothing would be what it is, because everything would be what it isn't. And contrary wise, what is, it wouldn't be. And what it wouldn't be, it would. You see? (Lewis Caroll)
I forgot to add that work has been good, it's been very slow .. I wanted to ask for some feedback on something.
So I happened to walk into a co-worker's office and realized one of the gals was crying. I don't do well with my own tears so I am awkward when someone else cries because I know what I don't want, however trying to guess what someone else needs .. good luck with that. She strikes me as someone who is similar in terms of she is very private when it comes to that and was horribly embarrassed when I came in. So I didn't want to pretend nothing was going on (yeah .. like I haven't lived my life ignoring the rhino in the room and pretending that was a coffee table), however I did not want to do the whole oh are you ok (someone else who she trusts was already present). Not my business however I did not want to be cold either .. where is the dang line?!
What I did do was look her in the eye and just ask if I could get her some water, did she need anything that I could provide (that was translating for me to, I get you are upset and I respect the fact you don't know me. I see someone else has it in hand.) She asked if I would run across the way and get her a drink and of course like I'm going to say no .. LOL!! It's not like I don't have the extra time at the moment.
Had she been alone I would have asked more personal questions as in what can I do for you, do you need a hug that kind of thing, I don't like other people in my space so I really try and respect other people. It's like people assuming they have a right to lay hands on babies and pregnant women, the last thing I wanted when I was pregnant was someone I didn't know touching me .. LOL! After my daughter was born I actually had a woman get right into Emily's face and I was like lady back the truck up I have no idea where you have been.
Anyway, how does one handle someone else's obvious distress in that way especially when they don't know them like that? It's different in meetings because I feel like meetings are a place to let go of garbage .. outside of meetings it's just different.
S :)
__________________
Faith minus vulnerability and mystery equals extremism. If you've got all the answers, then don't call what you do "faith". - Brene Brown
"Whatever truth you own doesn't own you" - Gary John Bishop
I don't know; I'm absolutely awful at it. I don't like touching/hugging anyone that I don't know very closely so that's out of the question. I look forward to reading other people's responses, because beyond "can i do anything to help?" I'm lost...
__________________
If I had a world of my own, everything would be nonsense. Nothing would be what it is, because everything would be what it isn't. And contrary wise, what is, it wouldn't be. And what it wouldn't be, it would. You see? (Lewis Caroll)
OMGOSH MissM .. after living in misery for soooo long I forget and I HAVE to remind myself to do that .. thankfully I have good girlfriends who drag me out by my hair .. ok .. by my ear .. lol. Then it's an effort .. something that doesn't come by nature for me .. usually fun finds me .. I guess there is something to be said for being so impulsive and spontaneous that is not all bad .. lol. I do get concerned I don't get the kids enough fun and I don't mean expensive fun I just mean fun, fun .. silly stupid stuff. Laughing until you hurt so bad and continuing to laugh. Making things up as you go. I don't know.
The boyfriend is such a keeper .. he's extremely polite as well as considerate, both in public and private. I listen to the two of them and think WOW .. both of them have already been through so much at such a young age I don't think anyone else would suit them as well as each other. What I enjoy so much is how innocent it all is between them. He doesn't do electronics and I really like, no social media. I mean he does some gaming however my daughter is probably more of a gamer than he is because I'm her mother .. LOL. His is very low key, low maintenance in terms of not pushy, not insecure and very accepting. I think I have seen my daughter be more her than she realizes since she's met him and it's translating to others as well.
S :)
__________________
Faith minus vulnerability and mystery equals extremism. If you've got all the answers, then don't call what you do "faith". - Brene Brown
"Whatever truth you own doesn't own you" - Gary John Bishop
I usually just keep silent unless i know them
Well enough To ask. I found during my divorce
My eyes were always red from crying not one
Person asked me are you okay?
They can sense Your sadness so they just leave
it alone. I was Fine with that, i would not like to
have gotten Caught crying. Many days it was a
Second to a time to keep it together before i got
home and could let it go.
You did the right thing asking about the drink
And respecting her privacy.
I think you handled the crying situation incredibly well. Better than I would have. I feel awkward when I see someone crying and it causes me to act awkward. I'm also one of those people who hates to have anyone see me cry. When I first started dating my boyfriend, we watched a movie together that made me cry. I held it in until I got to the bathroom and then let it go. I've since gotten comfortable enough with him to cry in front of him, but it took a while.
It sounds like you have a really nice life. Happy and peaceful and it seems like you have a lot to proud of. Congratulations!
I am a private person most of the time with my emotions. It is just a by-product of how I was raised. I am working on accepting/giving hugs - limited to chosen people. If I am at a meeting, and guy comes in for a hug, a part of me wants to put my knee up - just makes me uncomfortable. Women - I'm better.....some guys - like I've known 20+ years (softball), and haven't seen them all winter - sure - they know I am married and they are all way younger than I....so - it's a process and I am, like all other things, learning every day!
I am one who worked really, really hard to keep business and personal separate. I learned that many moons ago when some of my business became known at work and it just did not play out well at all.....so - gun-shy is me! I don't participate in gossip, drive-by discussions, etc. Just not my thing. I tried to always be very friendly, just very professional. Yes/No/Fine/Good to social type questions.
In the case you came across, I believe you did good! My first reaction to 'uncomfortable scenes' is to apologize for intruding. Even if it's public, I always feel as if I stumbled across something private, so make my amends on the front end. I then step away as fast as possible. I rarely will interrupt anything like this - esp. at work. I agree - a meeting is different. But I still try really hard to not engage unless I am asked to do so or it feels right to ask, "How can I help?" Those 4 little words are amazing for me. It let's another know I care and they can decide if they need/want anything from me.
Social situations in a business environment always baffled me. I had a boss who got a call and her parents were killed in a wreck. A very professional, private woman, she just said, "I have a family emergency, and need to leave." We all knew her style so nobody inquired. We found out later and she modeled behavior I would hope I could mimic if that happened to me. People are different, people feel different and there is no right/wrong style - it's situational IMO!
(((Hugs))) - my softball and golf are my fun! I love to be physical and certainly don't enjoy the night-scene - BTDT (Been There Done That) in my younger days!!! Everybody needs something to enjoy - it's a great stress reducer...
__________________
Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
