The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Even before AH went to rehab in January he came home from work and plopped on the couch and slept. Every household responsibility fell on me. He has always admitted he is a napper. Now since he has been home for about 7 weeks, this behavior has returned. I have to nag him to get anything completed. He gets up for dinner and goes to his AA meetings. That's it. Is this normal?? He used to be so productive before his disease progressed.
Suzann - hard to say what normal is for another....if he's got a sponsor, they will help him adapt and be the best version of himself that he can be. It will take a while for him to set his new normal without the alcohol in his life. Asking nicely for help is not nagging to me.....I ask and either get it or don't, and leave their response to them.
Hang in there and keep the focus on you and your recovery! As we say, this too shall pass! (((Hugs)))
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
Hi Suzann - Having had first hand experience with depression, and realizing that I was "self-medicating" in an effort to not feel, his behavior sounds very familiar to me. As I slowly healed from depression (with the help of a therapist), I was constantly fatigued, without energy. But the more the depression lifted, the more energy returned to me.
I wonder if there is a way to ask him to select, for now, the chores that he can manage, or that take little energy, and gradually build up? That's what I had to do for myself.
He still denies he is depressed but he asked me to pick up his new prescription and I noticed the dose of the antidepressant has been increased. He had a sleep study done because of the complaints of chronic fatique, it came back minimal sleep apnea, so its not that. We both have the same primary, so at my appointment I mentioned that he still wont do anything. His lab work came back he is not anemic. The dr thinks he might still be drinking. I honestly don't know. He doesn't seem to be.
