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Miracles In Progress 12 Step Recovery Forums -> Al-Anon Family Group -> Al-Anon Family Group -> Feeding into my a sisters drama/ chaos
Post Info TOPIC: Feeding into my a sisters drama/ chaos
lookingup


~*Service Worker*~

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Feeding into my a sisters drama/ chaos
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Yes I haven't been able so to grab any alanon tools up to deal with my a sis,I ended up leavening my home for the day to get my balance back and to take some deep breaths before I exploded on her which I didn't but I did feed all up into her mess with blaming me for everything i.e,I'm stealing from her,I'm snooping in her bedroom,I'm taking her food lol,etc etc,think she is delusional to,I could see the sickness in her but I tried the Jade tool it helped for a min. But then hell break lose again ,I'm dealing with an full blown addict an 54 yo addict ,I'm dealing with fire ,is my thinking,I did warn her on a few things,and one of them was to stay out of my business,and no I never stole and would never from her or anybody ,I told her she needs to move out she said she was as soon as an apt came open I told her there was a plenty apt open now she neednt have to wait she got quiet,I don't thi k she is capable of taking care of herself it's like she is on a low Level of being functionally able to take on any responsibilities of her own,but can go and drive butlives like a recluse 97% of the time she does cook for herself,but it still in my best interest and her best interest for her to have her own place to live so she has her own space and I have mine,she pulled a sneaky on me to get me to let her mo e in,little did I know she was anything like this ,it's a mess there goes my serenity ,I got to learn more tools and ways to cope and be able to feel at peace in. my own home I pay all bills,she just pays me some money each month to go toward bills.anyway that's what I'm dealing with today,and never know about tomorrow she takes a lot of narcotics.mostly prescribed to her.im trying to keep the focus on me that being hard to do when I'm in the middle of a war.my serenity means a lot to me,my getting out today was a great move to for it was a beautiful day,not good that I was forced out though,I have searched my tools over and can't seem to find all the right ones except ,easy does it ,and jade...........hugs lu



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hotrod


~*Service Worker*~

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Lu You did well You did not completely engage, you went for a walk and attempted to maintain your serenity. You are correct, it would be best if she found her own place but if she is not capable of caring for herself may she should be admitted to hospital for observation. If this paranoid behavior continues she might visit her Doctor for help.In the mean time keep on using your tools and do not engage.

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Betty

THE HIGHEST FORM OF WISDOM IS KINDNESS

Talmud
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~*Service Worker*~

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Thank you mrs Betty for reassuring me,I think I did well with ending that conversation with my tools although I had to repeat the same tool that I'm not gonna participate in this argument or argue with ,that this conversation is over and ended.her beady eyes peering.and yes she does need medical attention bad but refuses it and has said herself several times that she would have to be put inpatient ,she fighting it .

__________________

Do the next right thing~

ONE DAY AT A TIME!

 

 
lookingup


~*Service Worker*~

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Posts: 1008
Date:
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I'm not able to except my a sis as of yet ,I've decided to stay in my room today unless I can think of something to do outside where it's pretty and lovely be a great day for a walk,but I'm feeling so tired worn out feelings,more stressed than anything,I'm keeping this post up as a reminder on down the road to not ever allow myself to get back into this sit. Ever again ,I feel like I'm crazy living with craziness ,lol,I'm doing the ole childish thing of copying or dealing with sit,I'm slamming doors,a/s asked why slam doors my reply is I DONT LIKE YOU,end of conversation,how childish can I didn't know all this about her,all her lies and cover ups,for all the bad she does ,her kids have shut her completely out,except one ,and she will end it soon,she is actually moving around I can hear her banging dishes like she is washing them,that's another one of her fake ways ,she acting like she is,she got it made living here and she knows it,and she knows how to work.me and everything else to her benefit,I'm gonna have to stick to my guns of her getting her own place cause that's best for her and me for sure,I'll have to start pushing her,she knows how to black mail,I'm sure she getting a bit nervous about now since she knows I'm not liking her I know this is childish ,I'm gonna have to go check into my tool box for more tools,cause her words mean nothing to me,it's actions cause this ain't the 1st time and won't be the last time,feel like I'm at war in my own home. My thinking is in the back of my mind is this is a no win situation with her. That I'll end up having to move or leave my own home 13 yrs of living here,and I take my sister I grew up with closest to and loved so much into my home to hopefully like she said we would be spencer sisters growing old together,HA,that was a joke,jokes on me though,I failed yet again to see the all the warning signs surrounding her and the red flags ,ha how in the world did or could I've been so blind sided to her,I got a real LIVE SNAKE in my home like someone said I e let the wolf into the hen house.........LU,,,,,,I'm sure I'll be posting alot more on living with the addicts in. My home...........sticking with my recovery,about finished with step one,,,,God Grant me the serenity to except the things I cannot change which is people,places and things,.Courage to Change the things I can and that one is me ,my thinking and the Wisdom to know that person is me....lu



-- Edited by hotrod on Wednesday 16th of March 2016 01:33:42 PM

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Do the next right thing~

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hotrod


~*Service Worker*~

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It is Progress not perfection that we are seeking . It is important to take care of yourself in this difficult situation Go for a walk, enjoy the beauty in the day do not engage and most importantly do not sacrifice your serenity Nothing is worth that. Remember stay in the day, do not project to the future and ask HP for guidance.
Positive thoughts on the way.

__________________
Betty

THE HIGHEST FORM OF WISDOM IS KINDNESS

Talmud
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~*Service Worker*~

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Posts: 1008
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Thanks so much,that does help a lot.

__________________

Do the next right thing~

ONE DAY AT A TIME!

 

 
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Miracles In Progress 12 Step Recovery Forums -> Al-Anon Family Group -> Al-Anon Family Group -> Feeding into my a sisters drama/ chaos