The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
There are so many messages of strength and hope in this reading. Much of it is a discussion of the alanon pamphlet "A Guide for the Family of the Alcoholic". The first part of today's reading mentions that there are times that the As in our lives may use some of the disease's 'weapons' to create more reasons to drink. The A might create a situation of anger or anxiety, or create a scene in public. Before program many of us may have reacted and contributed to the A feeling justified in drinking in some way. In my case my now exAH wouldn't necessarily create scenes but as the normal frustrations of a day at work would unfold his disease would begin cataloging the injustices as the occurred. After a binge or leading right up to one I might hear, 'you want to know why I drink?' And then get a sort of terrible list of reasons. The reading points out that OUR part in this are the choices we make. Are we going to be part of that play? Or lovingly detach so that we truly aren't a part of whether or mot our A is drinking?
The middle of this reading is a description of the phrase 'to take offense'. The word 'take' is a clue to us that we can absorb that offense-- or NOT! Maybe instead of taking offense we take serenity into our lives.
For me one of the strongest sentences of the reading is "Eventually I stopped acting on my hurt feelings'. I am working on this concept every day, even in my life without an active A. I have noticed that when I do act on my hurt feelings I am contributing to something negative rather than heading toward the positive.
I hope everyone is feeling that positive today! Have a great Tuesday!
Thanks for sharing your thoughts on this powerful page from Hope for Today. I do see that it is important to accept that I do "have a part" in the insanity that goes on around me and once I can honestly see this and use alanon tools to "stop reacting and detach, the more serene my life will become.
I am indeed powerless over another's drinking and am not responsible for it however I am responsible for my own thoughts, feelings and how I express them. If I learn to express my feelings in a constructive manner, I will have a powerful tool in my tool box.
Great share Mary and a lovely reading for today. I try (progress, right?) to not take things personally - esp. from my qualifiers. If it gets around my edge, I do the best I can to pause and reflect to see my part and what can I do differently.
I am glad the program helped me to realize I am not on the sidelines, but in the fray. I can be a part of the problem or a part of the solution. I don't have to engage 'like for like' - I can take the high road and be peaceful, joyful and serene while detaching from the disease.
So many reasons to be grateful - all due to the program in my life.
Thanks for the service too Mary - have a great day!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
