The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I've found a few strategies when dealing with addicts like ,that's a shame,I'm sorry you feel that way,I'm not attending that issue or talk about that but we can can go for a walk etc,I need all the stratigies I can get to keep my sanity,when the addict starts pointing,blaming wether it directly or indirectly at the person ,talking about the person in a rude way indirectly in front or behind our backs ,it gets disgusting,anyway,any and all strategies will sure help thank you all ,I know we can all benefit from these..........hugs,lu
I have found simply stating that I no longer can participate in gossip ,or judging others because I found that it hurts me emotionally. My new set of principles ask that I keep the focus on myself and respond in a constructive manner to life. This generally points the conversation on to the principles and off we go,
I'm allowing my feelings to get hurt over little things I use the slogan qtip a good bit ,I'm still the bad person cause it's my home,dealing with addict sister in my home I do need all the strategies as far as qtip and whatever others that's out there.ty......hugs lu
Detachment takes practice - keeping the focus on myself, examining the internal messages that I told myself helped me to see that I allowed my feelings to be hurt because I told myself I was bad, I was guilty, they were right etc. Learning how to list my assets, and gratitude helped me to validate myself when under attack.
QTIP is useful as it helps us believe that anything someone says about us has nothing to do with us but all to do with them and who they are.
Thanks mrs Betty again I do list my G&a everyday or add to it everyday,I do feel like I'm under attack everyday almost,but I'm learning that it's not about me it is about them when I'm under attack,Qtip.......hugs and more hugs,mrs Betty you have helped me in so many ways over the years you wouldn't know ,I'm very grateful for you,and this board,I'm been thinking lately of how I can turn myself around and post about me keeping the focus on me here on the board I know I vent a lot about my qualifiers which I'm grateful for also to vent here and not vent elsewhere this board and alanon has kept more peace in my life than if I had to go this journey alone.thanks again for kind understanding and patience with me for years past to.........lu
