The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I spent the first part of my day returning my lovely Aunt to the Earth from which we all supposedly have come. I then went home, and prepared to go to her home to help my cousins pack up and clean up. We have truly enjoyed our time together and it's been lovely to see them - many live abroad.
As I was pulling up to the house, I got word that my 18 year old nephew was killed in a car accident yesterday. I am rarely at a loss for words or actions, but this stopped me in my tracks. I began shaking and of course, my parents were in hour 15 of 18 driving back to their home. They are 81 years old, and I was chosen to share the news.
I am beyond sad tonight. My aunt was a lovely gal who was with us on this Earth for 84 years. This young man is 18 years old. His life had barely begun. His mother is beyond in shock and we are all very broken.
Needless to say, I will be here/there and around as we go through another loss and are trying to understand the miracle of life/death/God/etc. My faith is often shaken at moments like this and I can not believe I will not ever see this child again, alive.
Please keep us all in your prayers. I feel as if I have double-duty grieving to do and haven't figured out how to even process this to start.
Thanks for letting me share!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
Oh what terribly sad news! I'm so sorry for your whole family who are enduring so much sadness and grief. I'm sorry you are the one breaking this awful news to your elderly parents. Stay close to us (((((Iamhere)))))))) as you go through it all. You are very loved. TT
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Surround yourself with people and elements that support your destiny, not just your history.
Thanks all.....I've been on the phone for hours and believe I am talked out for the night. I am very grateful that my parents have opted to not drive back for the service. There is not going to be a funeral as they are not believers, just an evening visitation. It is so hard to accept the loss of one so young. For me, it's even harder to see the young friends try to process the loss.
About 15 years ago, my brother's step-son was killed in a car accident at 17. It was very hard to process as an adult, but the pain and agony on the faces of the young high school kids was almost too much to see. I have matured a bit since then and have become more spiritual so am hoping I can continue to be of service instead of a basket-case....which is how I handled the last loss of a young loved one.
I truly appreciate the prayers and support. It's been a rough start to the new year and I'm so sad for all of us. He was a great kid and he will be missed.
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
Im so sory for the losses you are having. You are always so wise and comforting to me and others on the board. I hope your HP provides you with peace and support as you make your way through the grieving
I'm so sorry. Thoughts and prayers are with you. (((Iam)))
-- Edited by Iamhere on Sunday 31st of January 2021 11:27:07 AM
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If I had a world of my own, everything would be nonsense. Nothing would be what it is, because everything would be what it isn't. And contrary wise, what is, it wouldn't be. And what it wouldn't be, it would. You see? (Lewis Caroll)
So very sorry for the loss of your nephew at such a young age. You're right, his life had just begun and it's such a sad tragedy. My heart goes out to his mother. With my son just learning how to drive I am having such awful fears and tons of anxiety. But what can you do? You can't keep them locked up. It's the chance we take having children and I guess we will never understand the "big picture" while we are here on earth. Extra hugs to you today and in the following days....
Thanks MIP Family....it's been a tough day but I am in awe of the inner strength we are given when we really need it. I took my aunt and cousin over to hang out and help however we could and there is tons of food, flowers and utter shock in the home. There were 7 young men there (friends of the lost one) who all shook hands, gave hugs and just don't know what to do or where to go or .... yet, they were strong, pleasant, respectful and loving. You can just tell they do not know what to do and how to feel and how to be so they were just themselves, and were perfect.
The outpouring of love, thoughts and prayers is beyond words and larger than the heart-break....so it feels for now. Know that each of you has a special place in my heart and being. My hope is I can recoup more of my normal each day and determine the best changed normal that is of service.
My heart is still very sad but the outpouring of love, support and more gives me strength and hope. God is truly very good and so are those here with us on this earth. It's easy to see that most don't know how to help, what to say, or how to act. There are no words for the loss of a child, yet there is strength in silent support.
(((Hugs))) to all....
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
I am so very sorry for your families loss of this young soul. I pray that everyone can feel the loving embrace of their hp during this most difficult time. It is so difficult to make sense of tragic accidents particularly when they are so young.
