The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Today's reading speaks to the place that prayer holds in meetings and in program, and how some may be turned away if not religious or no longer religious. Personally, although i have had various degrees of participation in my particular religion, I have always felt comfortable with the praying part of our program. I have also appreciated the idea that what we are really saying in step one is that we are powerless-- not naming the power that will help us. There are several lines that resonate with me from this reading : "Life was not comfortable because I was constantly on guard". Oh my goodness that was me pre-alanon!! My instinct is still to be 'on guard' but I am working on it all the time. The first time I heard someone say this is a gentle program it was such a relief because I think so many of us were used to lives of extremes and severity. Also from the thought for the day: "there are no 'shoulds' in alanon." I have certainly spent a lot of my life trying to live by 'shoulds' and even more futilely- trying to get other people to live by my 'shoulds'! The greatest wisdom that I work on is that w my HPs help i can only work on my own life-- a work in progress! Im trying to replace severity with serenity!
Thank you Mary I too appreciate the gentleness of the program and how we are free to pick up the tools and work the program in a manner that works for us.
I was always on guard and ruminating as I walked about or attended an event. Today I recite the serenity prayer, make a gratitude list or simply am present to the wonders around me and appreciate them in the moment .
I find that prayer is extremely powerful and that prayers for courage, wisdom and serenity are indeed powerful.
Happy Tuesday to you as well Thanks for your service.
Thank you Mary, very good page. I related to this page, especially after working Step 11 and reflecting on my work to turn 'prayer' into a useful tool in my program. I also continue work to avoid thinking in terms of 'shoulds' for myself and others, although the program has helped me shake loose from the 'musts' that dominated my world before.
I have heard many times that there are no 'musts' in AlAnon, but this was the first time I remember reading there are no 'shoulds'. This concept was so helpful and healing for me as I came to know AlAnon and begin working to shape healthier perspectives, choices and behavior. In turn, showing empathy and allowing for choice in others continues to be a growth opportunity for me.
Great reminder, I am very grateful for the program and your service
__________________
Paul
"...when we try to control others, we lose the ability to manage our own lives." - Paths to Recovery
Thanks Mary for the daily, your ESH and your service! I do agree that before the program, my thinking and days were full of rigidity and discomfort. I felt as if I was in a state of waiting for the other shoe to drop or the next catastrophic event that would cause drama. I prayed for boredom and normal (my will) vs. God's will.
I had no issue in prayer before the program, but I often prayed for my desired outcome instead of God's will. In working the steps, listening to others and expanding my own spiritual existence, my faith of today suggests praying for God's will always, while believing and trusting that he did not put me here on Earth to be unhappy, unhealthy or incomplete. For me, prayer has become the best tool to change a negative thought into a positive or neutral one, and a fear of the unknown into a wait and see situations.
Prayer for me has become as natural as drinking a glass of water. When I am troubled, uncomfortable, afraid, uncertain, etc. I can find an almost immediate calm or peace by asking for God's will in my actions, thoughts, deeds and heart. This is one area where the 'fake it until I make it principal applies for me'. In the beginning, I wasn't 100% convinced that God would honor me with his will - but I went through the process, because I saw the power of program effort in others. It's no longer that way - I now believe in my deepest parts that God's will for me is the best way and praying for it feels very natural.
I also remember feeling very strange holding hands with members to pray at the meetings. That too has become very normal and natural to me, and there is even comfort in it today!
So, in my program, the power of prayer has been necessary and a gift of this program. So, very grateful for you all, the program and all the tools/steps of the program.
(((Hugs)))
__________________
Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
