The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I got a text from my son today that he had to move - again - he had been living in a normal, residential house with two other guys - they got along fine and all seemed good - unfortunately, the owner of the house (the Mother of one of the guys), has decided to sell the house - and they need to be out by the 1st - I suspect that my son didn't have a lease, thus the short notice.
Anyway, the old Joe would have burned up the iPhone text message keypad, but, THANKS TO AL ANON, the new Joe read the message and didn't respond right away - I thought about it on the car ride home from a meeting, I prayed a bit, and eventually responded by saying "I'm sorry to hear that - maybe the three of you guys can find another place together" - no immediate offers of money, or me fixing the problem for him before he had a chance to fix it himself - I know that this all sounds trivial to some, but for me, it was huge - SO VERY DIFFERENT from the way I used to be - I'm feeling pretty good about doing what I need to do here.
LOL, of course, who knows what'll happen down the road - for me or him - but for now, I did what I should have done - progress not perfection!
Way to go Texas Yankee! I can relate to everything you wrote, except the calls I've gotten regarding 'need to move' have been because mine has been booted for rule violation, use of substances, etc. In either case, just acting as if I didn't see the message/call yet and processing with my HP has saved my bacon a few times since I became active in Al-Anon. I am glad you were able to stop, find some tools, process and then respond!!
Keep coming back - it's looking good on you!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
As happy (proud) as I am for my moment of strength, I know there's gonna be a "next time", and I'm scared stiff about whether I'll be able to find the strength to do what I need to do - then again, that's worrying about tomorrow, I guess - never mind . . . LOL, plenty to worry about today.
And......you have more awareness - one day at a time, one moment at a time! You might surprise you - we'll know if/when it happens!!!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
