The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
C2C reading for December 6 speaks about anger. It points out that the feeling of anger did give us the illusion of power for a little while but that kind of false security always was short lived and then pain of the guilt and shame followed
I must point out that when I worked my first 4th step I discovered that I changed all my feelings: the sadness, confusion, disappointment and fear into anger because I felt powerful and the other feeling made me appear weak .
The Steps and a good sponsor taught me how to feel all my feelings" feel it", "express it" and then finally to let it go because the only real power available to us is that which is mentioned in the 11th step:" the power to carry out HP's will".
The quote is from, One Day At a Time in Al-Anon; "No one can control the insidious effects of the disease of alcoholism or its power to destroy the grace and decencies of life-----but we do have a power derived from God and that is the power to change our own lives."
Thank you alanon for the tools to keep the focus on myself, the ability to place principles above personalities, and to be able to validate myself as I treat everyone with courtesy and respect. These simple adjustments have made my life one filled with courage, serenity and wisdom
I was always afraid to get angry because I saw a violent brother out of control growing up. He ran the household, my parents did not protect us, and I did not let myself feel angry towards others. I turned my feelings all inward on myself. Over the years I learned that anger was a normal feeling, but I still collected it all and kept it inside. Yes it is now with my sponsor, Slogans, and the Steps, that I can let go of anger, and no longer store it up as before. I also don't take it out on myself anymore. I feel lighter, happier, and fogiving and compassion are easier to achieve. I really don't want to be angry at anyone anymore, except for a brief short while before I can Let Go and Let God. Someone on the board taught me: Face it, Trace it, Erase it~great tool to live by, Lyne
Mahalo Betty...I am always grateful to see posts on anger because my anger is mostly derived from and centered around frustration and impatience and reaction. I don't like anger because I discovered that it really hurts me more than anyone or thing else and it is destructive mind, body, spirit and emotions. I will continue to work on it with yours and the boards help. ((((hugs))))
Thanks Betty for the daily and your ESH.....I am so glad to learn that I don't have to keep a hold of anger, it's a choice.
I feel as if I spent enough time in my life already being angry at everything and everyone that it's no longer a good choice for me at all...I am very quick to remind myself when I start to get angry or frustrated that I have turned my life and my will over to a HP, and he's got a master plan that I know nothing about.
Anger for me is now dangerous and very threatening to my peace......I therefore will do just about anything I can to not go there and/or turn it over fast.
I too used to feel like anger and knowledge were power - I no longer do. And I am OK and happy to admit I am powerless - almost relieved actually!
(((Hugs))) to all and anger free!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
