And not so much .. LOL .. I really am my own worst enemy .. I guess the good news is that I have awareness of that and I really am trying to do things differently. 

I'm sorting through some feelings and things that are going on at the moment, what can I change, what can let go of and what do I need to address.  The need to address list is getting bigger.  There are some good things happening and for that I'm extremely grateful. 

Lately I'm having that ick feeling again which means my X is up to something and that is so not a good thing.  I'm just trying to take a breath and say ok God .. whatever you need to do .. however .. please .. no blind siding .. lol.  I kind of have a feeling I know what it's in regards to .. I'm just letting it ride at the moment.  It's not my circus not my monkey's and I could poke a very sore spot .. I've decided that's not the way to go.  So again .. biding my time.  It's one of those "if you insist" moments.  He's going to come out on the bad end of the deal. 

I happened to look at my divorce docket which I do from time to time to make sure that we are all on the same page .. I just do not trust these people and I have been shown ample reasons as to why not .. oi .. the stories continue .. once again someone has changed the docket and now it states that I get no maintenance .. I'm ok .. I have a copy of my Divorce Decree and that man seriously doesn't read anything .. that's what I'm waiting to address .. oi.  I had to laugh about that part of the deal.  So that was signed by him, myself and the judge that is what the judge will go off of not whomever changed that docket and it was definitely changed.  There are more things happening with court in terms of I've stirred up a setting precedence issues for other cases to come if this goes before the judge and I think based upon the logic I have it could benefit many people going forward.  It's going to cause a mess for attorney's who choose to drag things out to the point of it becomes issue upon issue.  He hasn't done what he's suppose to do and he's behind yet again.  As long as he is paying the majority I'm not going to get in his face .. I will allow the courts to deal with him. 

My paycheck didn't get here when it normally does .. yes, I'm a rarity at the moment who actually gets a check .. LOL.  I like paper what can I say.  My check came a day later than normal and that was on me .. lol .. whew .. I got everything done I needed to get done so that's a good thing.  It was just a little scary coming into the new week.  You know I pass the homeless everyday going to and from work and all I can think is there for the grace of God go I.  So I have tremendous gratitude and I say many prayers for people as I drive down the road in my beat up car, however beat up it's running and it's mine. 

The kids are doing so good and I really am so proud of them.  My daughters team has their first match next week.  My son is doing much better in school I think he's found his groove and he's making friends.  I'm glad about that, out of both of them he was the one who was having the hardest time with the move .. he seems to be more accepting and more open even to stepping out of some comfort zones. 

I realized I'm back to isolating again .. ugh .. I really have to work not to do that without question!  I have been making friends and hoping to make some really great friends at work.  It's just going to take time. 

It's been a good week and full of lots of changes/challenges .. and that's ok. 

There are a few things I have got to get addressed sooner than later and I am hoping that will start at the beginning of the year. 

All I can say is WHEW .. LOL!  Lots to do. 

Hugs S :)