The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Thanks Debbie This definition makes sense. I found it hard to implement until I was able to define myself and my responsibilities in a marriage and as a responsible parent The lines seemed to blur continually.
Thanks Debb for the post and for the lovely definitions. I too think these are a good start for boundaries. I know for more the boundaries that are in place are for self-preservation... vs. punishment. I had a ton of work to do with my sponsor to truly understand boundaries and detachment as 2 of my qualifiers were under-age. I had a fear (reasonable - maybe?) of them getting into trouble with the law and we (AH & I) being held accountable.
If I establish my boundaries from a place of loving detachment, they don't often have to change. I am quite certain my qualifiers understand these are not about them but about me.
Hugs to both - more for me to ponder - never want to stop learning and growing!!!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene