The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
So yesterday my AH sat down next to me and asked, Do you want to go to therapy with me or am I going on my own? Not sure what brought this on but ok, I'll go with it. I said, I think you need to go by yourself and then later maybe I will go with you. But you need to make sure whoever you see specializes in alcoholism. So that's where we leave it. I thought about looking up people and sending it to him but then decided that's his job and that if he truly wants help he will do it. I'm not going to lie, I'd love to know what he is going to say to the therapist, if he goes, but that's his business not mine. That is a big problem of mine, I am nosey. lol So again now the waiting game.
Kudos Confused for using your program tools to 'stay on your side of the street'. Hang in there and I understand and can also be nosey!!! (((Hugs)))
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
I am nosey too and ask too many questions. Today I am working on not asking just talking lightly about the day. My qualifier is going to therapy on his own and today we are going to marriage counseling with someone who is experienced with substance use disorder. I think to myself "does anyone question what I am doing all the time? Wouldn't that make me crazy if someone did?". Yes it would so why do I feel I can do that to my loved one? He is an adult and I have to give him the dignity of being one. Good for you for finding a way to stay out of his stuff.
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-youfoundme
Let go and let God...Let it be... let it begin with me...
The thing is when he usually goes places or does things I don't ask. I wonder but if he gets in the car and drives after drinking I refuse to act like I care so I don't ask him where he went. I just wanna know how much he blames me to the therapist for all this. It's terrible.
Confused, it doesn't matter how much he blames you, because the blaming is indicative of the disease and I really don't want to know what my AH is saying anyway, right, cause that is not minding our own business ...
Very freeing to look at it all this way.
-- Edited by Debb on Tuesday 13th of October 2015 09:46:44 AM
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"Forgiveness doesn't excuse bad behavior, but it
does prevent bad behavior from destroying your heart". ~ unknown
